


Severus and the Doctor

by Hfflanders



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:41:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 37,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27445789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hfflanders/pseuds/Hfflanders
Summary: Severus has escaped to the Muggle world. When his path crosses with an overworked ER doctor, he realizes that he isn't the only one with secrets and a past to escape. When a mysterious illness begins plaguing the Muggle and Magical worlds the two must work together to save everyone. Can they do it?
Relationships: Severus Snape/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 24
Kudos: 27





	1. The Woman at the Bar

The long mahogany bar gleamed glossy under the dim lights. He stood tall in a black t-shirt, black jeans, and comfortable boots as he dried glasses with a towel that he had tucked in his back pocket. The bar would open in ten minutes at six o'clock that night. He sat the glass down and tied back his long black hair in a low pony. Every liquor in its place, fruit and vegetable garnishes each in their spots and cut to his own specifications, juices and sodas lined up and ready to pour. 

"Sev, we ready to go?" called the bar manager Hank as he ambled to unlock the doors

"Yes. Let in the masses" Severus joked drily, in a way that he had taken to doing since taking this job a year ago after the war 

As if he didn't care. As if he was calm. As if he was laid back. As if. 

The bar had become his second home. He had answered an ad in a Muggle paper, and the owner took a liking to him straightaway. He had the chance to be around people and still remain unseen, working every night from six pm to two am. Mixing drinks and cocktails reminded him of Potion's work: making the exact measurements and taking care to see that each individual step was taken in order for the drink to taste the best. He had even invented several drinks of his own that had become crowd favorites. 

When he left the bar, he slept for a few hours in his studio apartment until the nightmares woke him. Then he worked in a small store front that he rented from Hank, selling "herbal remedies" to the ordinary citizens of Denver, Colorado. Business boomed, he kept busy and didn't have to think about the past. He needed to stay busy or else the thoughts took over. The panic would overcome him. The depression would hang heavy like a rain cloud. 

It was better to be busy. 

The bar wouldn't be filled until around eight, when the college night classes would let out, the couples on dates would be done with dinner, and the night crowd would begin to crawl out of their homes. He sat on a stool with his book and waited.

Eight o'clock rolled around and the regulars trickled in. Working men and women who wore their uniforms, college kids who needed a cheap beer, and parents who needed to reclaim a part of their independence away from their children. 

And finally, one solitary woman who walked in every night since he began this job between nine and eleven thirty. Hank called her Doc. She ordered two scotch and sodas while huddled in the corner bar seat with a book until one am. Hank informed him she drank for free and while she always left him a great tip, he had no other answers. 

The crowds seemed to know and respect her, acknowledging her yet giving her space. She didn't engage in unnecessary chatter, but she wasn't rude. He understood that. 

"Sev, my man! That focus drink you made me was the best!" complimented one of the college students, Alvin, reaching out to shake his hand over the bar. 

Sev. A name that seemed cool, much more intriguing than his real name. A new persona. A shield to his insecurities. People liked Sev better than Severus. Hell, he liked Sev better than his old self. 

"I'm glad it worked well. Tell me when you need a refill" he told Alvin, knowing that the mixture would work, it was a wit sharpening potion. 

Muggles didn't believe in magic, but they believed in herbal remedies. They believed in natural cures and homeopathy. He loved his magic, it was something that set him apart but it was also something that he needed a break from. 

Admittedly, he waited on Doc to come in. She kept to herself, caramel brown hair plaited in a French braid, heart shaped face leaning against the wall as she sipped her drinks and read from massive books, highlighter or pen in hand. 

He had no courage to speak to women. He found her attractive, but he didn't want to intrude on her space. Men did that to her every night and she sent them away each time. He wanted to use Legilimency, but that wasn't fair. Not to someone who couldn't defend their mind. Not to someone who didn't even know that it was possible to be infiltrated. 

Vodka on the rocks, gin and tonic, stout beer on tap, Manhattans and Cosmos...The night flew by and Doc strode in, her face set in stone. 

"Hey Doc" he greeted her, setting out her usual scotch and soda on the rocks

"Hey Sev. Can you make the next one a double please?" she asked tiredly, leaning against the wall as she opened her binder full of papers

"Rough night?" he asked rhetorically, not expecting an answer

"It's always rough. Tonight was a disaster. Keep them coming please" she replied back quickly, downing her drink in one gulp 

This was out of character for her; she seemed out of control and upset. Usually she sat stoic yet kind. He refilled her glass and moved down the row to the other customers. The night progressed and several men approached her, smelling the opportunity to weasel their way in through her emotional cracks. But, she didn't accept the drinks, she ignored the men and eventually Hank threw them out because they wouldn't quit. 

They weren't the regulars, those people knew better. They knew Hank would kick their ass if they messed with her. 

Doc sat in the seat, admirably holding her liquor until she was the last one left at last call. 

"Do you have a ride?" he asked her curiously as she shut her binder 

"I only live two blocks away. I can walk" she told him, standing up and immediately falling to the floor

He hurried over, helping her stand up. She couldn't walk home this way. He met Hank's eyes, wisened and sage and shrugged his shoulders. 

"Sev should walk you home Doc. You're not looking too good tonight" Hank called over to her, his massive body akin to a muscled wall, bald head shining under the lights. 

A soft man underneath a brick exterior. 

"I don't need help" she argued annoyedly, determined to walk across the room, but failing

"You can fumble around in your own place, but not here. Let's just get this over with" Severus told her in a strict tone, feeling as if she was a student rather than a doctor 

She sighed, rolling her eyes and taking his arm, walking out the door into the balmy June air

"I'll show you the way" she instructed as they walked down the quiet street, no cars and no people. 

That was fine. He didn't want to talk, he didn't need to show his incompetence. He didn't want her to see how awful he was at empathy. He didn't want to crack and care about someone. He could be a bartender and listen, but never take any actions and that was fine. Acceptable. Unlike where everything was his responsibility in his past life. 

As they walked and the breeze blew in her face, she straightened up and leaned on him less. He had to admit that it was nice to feel another presence beside him. She still held onto his arm even though she no longer wobbled on her feet. Maybe she needed someone too. 

"My apartment is on the top floor, you don't have to walk me up" she assured him, unable to get the key in the door to the locked lobby. 

"You can't even get the key in. I'll take you upstairs and leave you in your living room, but you need help. Quit being incorrigible" he told her firmly, turning the key himself 

"I don't need help!" she exclaimed, letting go of his arm and falling to her knees

"Oh for gods sake..." he muttered, slinging her bag around his shoulder, hauling her up, arms around her waist as they walked to the elevator 

Up to the fourth floor, they exited and she handed him her keys, 4C. Turning the deadbolt, he looked around at the tidy apartment, books upon books lined the walls, half melted candles sat everywhere, an aquarium full of fish bubbled in the corner. 

Doc flopped onto her chaise style sofa, unceremoniously kicking off her shoes, eyes already shut. He looked around, noticing a large blanket over the back of the sofa. He tossed it over her unconscious body, and locked the door behind him. 

Whatever happened to her, she needed to forget and he needed to get some sleep before bottling the Invigorate "remedies" in the morning. 

—————

When he first became a bartender, he immediately got along with Hank. He had no place to stay and no references to give. He allowed Hank, a fifty something retired military man, to fill in the blanks that he had lived in disguise most of his life and couldn't provide proof of anything. The bald headed ex-marine had a penchant for the outsiders. 

Hank also lived alone, sometimes traveling to the next state over to visit his grown children. They struck up a friendship, always speaking around issues that neither wanted to confront. A mutual respect. 

Around ten thirty am, the door to his store opened and he raised his eyebrow at Doc, shuffling into the shop with thick waves of hair hanging down past her shoulder blades. 

"She lives" he joked sarcastically, continuing to stack shelves 

She blushed deep red, candy apple on full cheeks before clearing her throat 

"I'm sorry you had to walk me home. I shouldn't have drank that much" 

He shrugged, uncertain of how to react 

"Don't worry about it. We all have our bad nights" 

And it was true. His mind involuntarily flashed back to the three months he spent continually drunk and wishing for death on the floor of his childhood home, desperately seeking to move on after the war while the memories sought to infiltrate his defenses. 

"I know...but you didn't have to. So, thanks for not taking advantage of me" she said awkwardly, shuffling her feet 

"Yes, it was a terribly difficult feat for me to keep my wits in check" he snarked back, instantly regretting it 

Instead of being offended, she laughed

"Well, one never can tell. Can I repay you?" 

"No, I don't need rewarded for displaying base line decent human behavior" 

"Okay then...I guess I'll see you later tonight" she offered a small smile and wave as she turned and walked out the door. 

He didn't know why he got so annoyed at her remark. Well, if he was honest, he understood. He didn't think he was truly a good man. Would he have still continued to be a death eater if Lily hadn't been targeted? How many times did he wish that he had just left Dumbledore? How could he have gone along with all the plans? How could a good man truly watch his friends and colleagues die, for the sake of some supposed greater good? 

He had no answers. And it angered him. He always knew the answer and now there weren't any. Just a blank slate and open road with no destination. Just keep stocking shelves. Keep making the remedies. Keep on keeping on.

The night wore on at the bar and he found himself anxiously awaiting Doc's arrival. Earlier than usual, at 9:30 she meandered in, shaking her hair loose from it's ponytail. He noticed she didn't have her badge clipped to her belt. 

He fixed himself to making her normal drink, sitting it down as she did 

"Curbside service" she joked, a little more at ease with him since the drunken debacle the previous night 

He offered a small smile, acknowledging her presence. The title of her book caught his eye "Infectious Disease and its Spread." 

"Planning for a biological apocalypse?" he questioned drily, arching his eyebrow high 

Looking up at him, she nodded solemnly

"Always" 

His mind involuntarily flipped back to he and Albus in the tower. Always was a lie now. That servitude was done and finished. His feelings and loyalty vanished. Purpose gone. Brought back to the present, he felt the heavy bottomed glass tumbler slip from his hand as he dried it, the shatter echoing around him. 

He didn't feel a thing until Doc reached over the bar and inspected his palm. A giant gash from below his index finger all the way to his wrist gushed out bright red blood. 

"Hank, do you have the field kit?" she called out calmly to Hank who stood a few feet from Severus

Hank glanced over and motioned with his beefy hand for them to follow him. Doc wrapped her scarf around his hand tightly, squeezing. 

"You'll ruin your scarf" Severus grumbled, hand beginning to throb, embarrassed that he had screwed up in public 

"I'm an expert at getting blood out of clothes, I'm not worried" she answered casually, the three of them seated in Hank's office 

"I've never seen you break a glass once in the whole year you've been here Sev. You okay?" Hank questioned in concern, inspecting the gash in his hand with a grimace 

"I'll be fine, the glass was wet and it slipped" he muttered, unwilling to admit the memory had shaken him 

"Doc will take good care of you, I'm going to go serve the drinks" Hank patted his shoulder as he shut the door behind him 

"Wiggle your fingers and thumb please" she asked patiently 

He moved them carefully, hand stinging 

"Good. No nerve damage. I'm going to clean it up and tape it shut. You can go to the hospital to get stitches" she asked, unwrapping the scarf gingerly 

Muggle stitching. More like torture. He could just mend it with a quick spell but there would be no explanation as to how it healed so fast. He would have to let her sew his skin like a garment. He nodded his agreement. 

"Can't you stitch it?" he questioned, eyeing the twine and suture scissors in the box 

She raised her eyebrow at him incredulously 

"That'll hurt like a son of a bitch, we don't have any lidocaine" 

He had lived through worse, snake fangs shredding his neck for one...

"I don't want to miss work to go to the hospital" he told her, lying through his teeth 

"Hank won't care, plus he hates blood, you saw how fast he bolted out of here" she assured him, still holding his palm in her hand 

"I don't mind. Really. No fuss or frills" he spoke bravely, sitting back in his seat

Expression vaguely impressed she nodded, threading the needle and twine through the scissors. She tossed him a towel from the shelf behind her. He held it up confusedly 

"That's for you to bite down on so you don't scare the customers while I sew your skin shut" she shrugged, pouring a few bottles of water over the cut to cleanse it and free it of glass shards, bending low to inspect it with a small magnifying glass, the rust colored beta-dine came next, the contents in the bowl below his hand changing to crimson. 

"Ready?" 

"Go ahead" he told her, bracing his shoulders as the needle bit into his skin. 

A stinging hex sent with vengeance felt more bothersome. He watched as she skillfully drew the needle back and forth, his skin closing shut little by little 

"Do this often?" he asked, the weight of silence breaking him down into small talk 

"I've stitched up so many people and various body parts I can't even remember anymore. You're one of the few to not make a sound though" she remarked, eyes still on the wound 

He didn't know what to say. It wouldn't be prudent to compare this experience to being on the receiving end of a hex or a snake fang. A few minutes passed in silence as she put the finishing touches on his hand, wrapping it in sterile gauze. 

"You're all done. Keep it clean but don't get it excessively wet. Re-wrap it with clean gauze every night. I'll take the stitches out in a week or so. I know where to find you" she stood, cleaning up the garbage, dumping the bowl down the bathroom sink on the side of the office 

"Thank you Doc" he told her awkwardly, waiting for her to finish 

"You're welcome" she said, standing next to him beside the door 

"What do I owe for such superior service?" he asked genially, noticing the tiny bump in the middle of the bridge of her nose and the way she stood with more weight on her right leg than her left 

"Nothing if you answer me one question first" she crossed her arms, chin up 

Nodding, he waited for the query 

"You were a soldier. Top level. Second in command type stuff. Right?" 

He held back a gasp. Yes. A soldier. Serving directly under two masters. For the greater good. Second becoming first begrudgingly. First class winner and traitor. How could she tell? Was it that simple, did he scream murderer? Did his behavior scream traitorous spy? 

"That question is delicate" he answered cautiously, opening the door for her

"And there's my answer. I can spot a soldier a mile away..." she breezed past him, slinging her back over her shoulder, waving goodbye to Hank.

"She's a hell of a woman Sev. What do you think?" Hank asked with a lilt, moving over to make room for him behind the bar 

"She seems very accomplished" he stated vaguely, ignoring Hank's attempt at a dig for information 

"She saved my son. Ran through front line enemy fire to drag him back to safety. She was the only one to do that, no one else was brave enough" Hank told him proudly

War? What war? Muggles continually fought in blood shed for profit, land, and religion. Of course, he couldn't speak considering what happened with the dark lord. 

"She's a soldier then?" he clarified, fighting to remain uninterested 

"Special forces combat medic. On the front lines, the first in to get the wounded out. It was considered a doomed mission to get my son out of a ditch surrounded by guerilla fighters...But she convinced them. She helped re-attach my sons' arm back on in the field hospital" Hank explained proudly, showing him a faded picture that he pulled from his wallet

Doc stood in full soldier garb, helmet over her head, medic patch on her arm, standing beside a tank. The young man beside her stood as well, arm in a sling. 

"Roger came home shortly after that. Doc stayed until the end of the Gulf War. I wanted to know who my son's savior was, and come to find out she had just taken a job at the hospital here in town to finish out her residency" Hank continued on, opening up about his life for the first time in the year they worked together 

"How long was that war?" he asked curiously, stacking glasses carefully 

"A year and a half. Roger was there a year. Doc stayed the whole time. Deferred her schooling to serve. The town is proud to have her" Hank answered, beginning to turn off the lights 

"I'm glad your son is alive" Severus spoke softly as the two men walked to the door 

"Me too" 

That was enough for a night.


	2. The Doctor

Deep breath, she told herself. The world is fine. Remember your bearings. It's fine. It's fine. Even if it doesn't feel fine...It is. 

"Doctor Breathwaite, do you have a minute?" asked one of the interns, following her down the hallway of the county hospital. 

Breaking out of her brain fog, Eve sighed, the four medical charts in her hands screaming for her attention. 

"Sure" she turned and focused on the harried intern who shifted from side to side uneasily 

"I was wondering if you could help me with my suturing technique?" 

"No. You should have learned that in class. If you haven't mastered it after six months on rotation you are hopeless. God, why do they always pick me?" she thought mercilessly

"Sure. I have five minutes before these reports. Come on" she spoke kindly, opposite of the voice in her head and ushered the young woman into the small office that she shared with another doctor on the floor

Today wasn't horrible. The gushing blood hadn't triggered her today like before. The sounds hadn't come back to her, the wounded screams and the bullets raining down like hail. No, today was fine. A few stitches to sew, an impacted bowel, and garden variety stomach bugs. She was due a day like today and her coworkers knew it. Not one for excessive chatter, she moved through her patients skillfully and with detail. She refused to call attention to herself, it was the mark of a good medic, a good soldier. 

Her knee ached at the memory, the stray bullet from her last rescue mission tore through her skin, destroying part of the joint. It only ached after climbing too many stairs and today the elevator was out of order. Taking a deep breath, she changed into a different outfit, bagging the clothes she wore during her shift to wash, and walked into the humid summer air. 

Hank would be worried, it was nearly eleven. She smiled at the thought of his burly physique twisting his fingers in nervousness at her tardiness. Hank was a good man, a good father, a good friend. He gave her accolades and beamed with pride. 

Not like her father. The general. Who only offered criticism, and the advice to be successful or die trying. He had scoffed at her medical discharge and moved onto her brother, who was on the fast track to become a staff sergeant. 

Sighing deeply, she pushed open the heavy wooden doors of the tavern style pub. The regulars around the bar nodded at her, knowing she held their secrets and wouldn't ever tell: pumped stomach, overdosed teenagers, and unplanned pregnancies. 

It was a strange kind of solitude. 

Sev already placed a scotch and soda at her seat before she reached it. He was a good bartender, much better than the last guy, Ricky. Ricky was a show off, a blowhard, a man who wanted to hear himself talk. He eventually left when a job working at the local casino opened up. Good riddance. 

But Sev was calm. Quiet. Listened to people when they talked and spoke sage words that sounded like he was giving more information than he actually did. He moved stealthily and his eyes roamed the bar continually, he didn't miss a thing. He remembered details. His drinks were precise. Nothing remarkable about his appearance, except the way he held himself. Tall, proud, and sharp. 

He thought he had a secret but she knew a spy when she saw one. After having spent her life around top ranking military officials, the best academic schools and foreign dignitaries, she had the skill to sniff out a professional liar like a bloodhound goes for bodies. 

He only confirmed her thoughts when he sidestepped her question. She knew he would do that. But now he was off balance. Now she planted a seed of doubt in his mind about how strong his cover truly was and if anyone else could tell. Relationships were nothing but psychological mind games. 

Some were easy wins and others put up more of a challenge. Sev would be a challenge should she choose to pursue him. But after that drunken debacle the other night, she didn't think they would be friends anytime soon.

Embarrassing. Losing control of herself like that showed weakness. Not being in control of her mind when she needed her wits the most. The flashback weighed her down, the smell of spilled iron and burnt rounds invaded her nose in the sterile hospital room. Ignoring the screams coming from her mind, she continued on with a steady hand. 

The young boy with a massive bullet hole in his stomach had lived. But the three boys who came in with him didn't. One dead on arrival, the other two not surviving emergency surgeries. She couldn't prevent it but the loss still hung heavy around her neck. 

The panic attack that followed left her hiding in the bathroom stall for fifteen minutes, forcing air through her nose and the vomit to stay in her stomach. 

She knew it didn't help to get blackout drunk. But it was something she could handle. Calculated chaos. A risk in which she knew the outcome. 

Control. 

Always a need for control. Battling destruction in bodies for healing. Grasping at straws to build a tower. So frail in its structure. Just the appearance of security. Enough to fake. Enough to believe that she was safe. 

"Would you like another?" the baritone accented voice broke into her thoughts, grounding her back into the moment 

Yes. Another. 

"Yes please" she offered a small smile, shame still pricking at her shoulders for the other night

"No reading tonight?" he asked politely, setting her drink down in front of her 

No. It was time for vacation. A time for relaxing her mind and her body. No more reading about potential disease for the next week. This week would be about her and the couch. 

"Not tonight. How's your hand?" she glanced down at his palm, noting only a bandage over it now 

"Healing well. I took out the stitches" he blithely commented, about to walk away 

Sitting promptly forward she questioned incredulously

"You took them out yourself?" 

He rolled his eyes, pouring a stout on tap for a college kid at the end of the bar. 

Either he was stupid or he had some sort of training. The action clawed at her, made her want to demand to see his palm. Made her slightly uneasy because if it was done incorrectly or too early, he could risk infection. 

But this was her vacation. And she needed to let it go. 

Sev sat down another scotch, leaning across the bar, his angular jaw wearing a smirk, inches from her face, whiff of a sharp herb and peat moss tapping her nose 

"Hank said don't start your vacation with a hangover" 

She rolled her eyes again, casually flipping a middle finger at Hank, who was laughing across the room at the dart board. He knew what it was like, living with the memories. And she couldn't prove it, but something told her that Sev did too. 

"Hey beautiful, want a drink?" a cocky voice asked from her right side 

Inhale. Exhale. Eye roll 

"No thank you" 

A tall man in a business suit stepped a few inches closer, overwhelming cologne strangling her throat, his clean shaven face too tan under the bar lights, hair gel slick and crispy 

"Start your vacation off right. What do you do? Teacher? Nurse?" he smiled, showing off two rows of impossibly perfect teeth. 

Veneers. It would be easy to shatter them if it came to smashing his face on the bar top. Expensive and fake. 

"I said no. I don't take drinks from anyone. Leave me alone" she sat up straighter, voice deadly calm, front towards enemy. 

He rolled his eyes and laughed condescendingly, reaching out his hand to touch her face, nearly straddling her lap 

"Come on, give me a chance" 

She waited, as soon as his hand laid on her cheek, her knee jerked up and made satisfying contact with his groin. He doubled over amid the laughs from the regulars. Hank rounded the corner, ready to toss him out. But the stranger recovered quickly, forgetting his charm he arched his arm back and lunged at her. 

In an instant she switched over to her training. Popping up from her chair she landed a solid block to the throat, then shoved him down to the ground, easily wrestling his arms behind his back, her body weight resting on the fragile bones of the wrist, one more move and she would pop out his shoulders and break his wrists. Adrenaline coursed through her, blood rushing and drowning out all the cheers from the crowd. 

Breathe. The trouble is gone. 

Hank gripped her shoulder, getting into her face, making eye contact. Silently asking: you good? 

She nodded, standing up and sitting back into her seat as if nothing happened. Hank grabbed the guy by the scruff of the neck like a naughty kitten caught shredding the couch, threatening to call the police if he came back. 

"Doc, you okay?" Hank asked quietly, shielding her from the gawking glances around the room 

Okay is a relative term. Heart about to explode. Tunnel vision. Shallow breath. Shaking hands. Imminent death. 

"I'm fine. He's lucky I chose to subdue him and not smash his ugly teeth on the counter" she laughed roughly, nodding at the older man who wore a concerned expression like a mask 

"I would have enjoyed seeing that. You don't have to go full combat if you don't want to. I've got your back" he whispered, knowing that she would always go full combat, it was instinct. 

Always be ready to defend. 

A small vial of serum showed up beside her drink. Rolling it in her hand, she looked up at Sev curiously. 

"It's a smelling solution. It will calm you down" he offered factually, no sympathy. 

"I don't need to calm down" she argued, proud of her social disguise and ability to function despite crippling paranoia. 

He rolled his eyes. How damn rude. 

"Your hands are shaking. You're sweating at your temple. Your eyes are dilated and your neck is flushed. No one else is paying attention but I am. If you don't want help that's fine. But don't lie" 

Annoyed at his accuracy, she opened the vial and took a small sniff. Eucalyptus, citrus, and something vaguely sweet and spicy perked up her senses. Placing the cap back on, she slipped the vial into her pocket. That would come in handy. 

"Will I see you at Hank's birthday party this weekend?" she asked him, ready to embrace her couch and late night television. 

He nodded, barely glancing at her, no emotion at her outburst, as if he saw things like that all the time, slim back turned as he cleaned glasses. 

Definitely a spy. And she would find out the truth.


	3. Get in the Boat

The door to his balcony flung open at the behest of his wand, he always loved a bit of flair. Fresh air circulated through the clean and minimal apartment. Tidy bed in the corner, high quality green silk sheets and black silk comforter. 

He sat in an overstuffed arm chair tucked away in the corner. A mug of peppermint tea cooled beside him, pressed herbs and flowers decorated the main wall behind glass frames. Tall white candles, half burned, wedged in heavy pewter holders; books lined every inch of the other wall filling the built ins to their breaking point.

This apartment belonged to him. His space. No one knew where he lived. He refused to let anyone know, even Minerva. He wanted his old life completely separate from this one. He had suffered for thirty nine years for others and he would be damned if he suffered any longer. 

It hadn't been easy, living in the aftermath of the war. The death eaters fled like ants, scurrying away to live in faraway countries under new aliases. Much like him. However, he didn't try to escape his fate. He was no coward. Once out of the hospital, he came before the Wizengamot, and professed to the murder of his friend and mentor, Albus Dumbledore. 

He fully expected a harsh sentence. Life in a jail cell. No visitors. A long and lonely death. Nothing less than he deserved. But, the board of witches and wizards listened to his story with near sympathy, many of them knowing first hand how Dumbledore collected people for his game play. And to his chagrin, the golden trio showed up to his trial, petition in hand with signatures of most Hogwarts staff and students. 

No sentence was given. He was awarded for his role in the war and given highest honors for saving Harry. There was no law for pre-decided mercy killing, but Dumbledore's ways of manipulation were well known. And most people were exhausted over the idea of more punishment and death. 

So here he sat, soaking in silence and surreptitiously keeping up with the wizarding world through letters with Minerva and Narcissa. He chose to stay away from the American magical community, he didn't want the attention. He would never be able to trust their sincerity. 

His circle was small, life lived within a one mile radius. And no one got in. No one even knew his real name. Hank believed he was a war hero, bound to a life of secrecy. To his customers, he was Sev; the herbalist with the best hangover cure. Or, Sev the bartender who made the drinks strong and precise and listened to every banal issue blasted at him. 

He could do anything and be anyone. The choices overwhelmed him. The ability to keep his life simple and minimal soothed his anxiety, focusing on one small step at a time and not some grand plot. 

Sighing, he drank the tea quickly. Tonight was Hank's birthday party and he promised to attend. He couldn't afford to burn bridges with someone who gave him a second chance. One night of pretending he belonged would be simple. 

Doc would be there. He didn't even know her real name. Younger than him by a few years, her eyes saw demons. The way she went eerily calm in the face of danger, collected and nearly blank, he understood that. Inside he knew a hurricane raged. 

Because that's how he felt all the time. Control the outside to calm the inside. She was trying to figure him out and it would have been comical if she wasn't so damn succinct. Right for the jugular she called him out as a spy. Not that he would confirm that, but she did catch him off guard. It grated his nerves the way she smirked at him, like she unearthed a secret.

She wouldn't be able to figure him out. He had a stone cold shield that no one could pass through. No one.

He stared in the hallway mirror at his long face, purple and white scar peeking out of his black shirt. Self consciousness gnawed at him. He left the hair tie around his wrist. His hair grew out since the war and he had no urge to cut it. Sometimes it felt good to hide behind something.

————

"You know you could take a night off from mixing drinks" Doc sidled up to the makeshift bar in Hank's backyard, a beer in hand

He forced his eyes away from her disarming grin, floral sundress and pretty legs barefoot on the grass. She had a mission in mind when it came to him and he wouldn't make it easy. 

"What better way to get to know people?" he asked simply, mixing a vodka and cranberry for Hank's oldest daughter Marilyn 

"It's not your thing to grab a beer and sit around the fire" Doc asked, leaning over the plywood counter top 

No. That involved social skills that he was not willing to expend. It served no purpose. 

"I prefer to keep my hands busy" he figured that answer would suffice and she would leave him alone 

Part of him wanted her to stick around, but he couldn't admit that. 

She nodded silently, not saying anything but staying rooted to the spot. He gave into himself, justifying Legilimency because he knew she had an express purpose in speaking with him. Most people didn't. 

Easily slipping into her mind, he held back shock at the palpable fear that radiated forth, quick and fleeting memories of screaming and bloodied soldiers, then visions of him at the bar offering a smirk and a scotch. A seductive memory of her and Hank's son Roger, engaged in an act that was more than friendship at her apartment. Finally, a thought stream about him...

I wonder what he's thinking, being around all these people...If he's anything like me he's just pretending to be calm, but he's already scoped out the threats...Or he is normal and not fucked up. How am I going to tell Roger I don't want to hook up tonight...

Beginning to sense that he overstayed, he slid out of her conscious and back to the present. Impressive. Her entire body still and calm, her brain rioting. He understood. 

"Do you have any plans for tonight" he asked in what he hoped was a neutral tone 

She took a drink of her beer, a dark Belgian stout and shook her head, long waves rustling

"Nah. I usually stay and help Hank clean up after the war stories have started. Usually, someone asks me about my dad and I have to tell them he is classified. Then they spend a while discussing him and his legacy. Then they ask Roger about how I saved him and I have to pretend I care about retelling the story. I'm not the kind of person who wants to keep reliving the past. War didn't make me proud...Too much?" 

Her voice shook slightly, a sign of vulnerability. Still suspicious of her intentions, he shook his head and answered cautiously 

"No, it's not. I think I should like to leave before those start as well" 

Eyebrow arching, she turned to scan the room 

"Then you should go, because all those retired Marines are about one beer away from their glory days" 

Muggles made war into a sport. A game of winners and losers with no thought to the desolation it brought. He couldn't be around that. 

"Thanks Doc. I should go tell Hank goodbye" he offered her a small smile, walking out from behind the plywood counter stacked on top of cinder blocks 

"My name is Eve..." she spoke up suddenly as his back was turned to her 

Eve. Fitting. In biblical times wasn't it Eve who brought down the destruction of man? Was he willing to face that destruction? 

One walk around the block couldn't hurt

"Well then, Eve. Do you want to escape the war room?" 

As if she was waiting for him to ask, she immediately began to walk in step, waving goodbye to Hank, who was enthralled in a retelling of some story and gave back a halfhearted nod. 

The silence of the suburban street relieved his ears, the stars just beginning to appear in the navy sky above the hazy yellow street lamps. 

Together they walked in silence for several blocks until a split in the street forced them either left or right. 

"Thanks for offering to get me out of there" she said with a nervous smile, for once appearing uncertain of herself 

"No need to thank me" he answered gruffly, the waves of vulnerability knocking him off guard 

She stepped forward, the beachy smell of sunscreen settling in his nose. Her body pressed him up against the high brick wall around someone's yard, hidden away in the corner between streetlights. Forcing his thoughts to still, he refused to be brought down by a pretty woman. 

With a knowing and wicked grin, she ran her finger down his pocket, right where his wand was; he never went without it. 

"Show me yours and I'll show you mine" she teased with a lilted innuendo. 

"I'm not sure what you're talking about" he pressed, feigning ignorance 

Rolling her eyes, she stepped back and responded shortly 

"Yes you do" 

"Have you had too much to drink again?" he asked sharply, pushing the weight off of himself 

Could she be a witch? That wasn't possible, she was a Muggle doctor. 

Cheeks flushing in anger, she whirled around and began to walk away as she tossed the accusation at him 

"Whatever lie you want to live that's fine. Just know that I know" 

Sweat began to bead on his forehead. He couldn't let her see that he was flustered. For all he knew, she meant something sexual. He had never had a woman be so forthcoming before, but anything was possible. Especially in a world where no one knew of his reputation and past. 

"Then prove it" he challenged her swiftly retreating back into the darkness 

She stopped in her tracks, shoulders straightening as she calmly entered his space again 

"I don't need to prove anything to you. We both know what we are and we both know what you did at that party " 

"Such circular language. Lesser men would fall for it. Not me. Facts or else you're just fishing" he pushed, jaw clenched to keep from jumping to conclusions. 

"Then get in the boat with me" she teased, walking back down the street, pointing at a car that he took to mean was hers. 

"I'll walk. It's too late to go on a boat ride" he continued along in the vein of deception 

"That's your choice. I'll see you tomorrow" she told him with a shrug, engine quietly coming to life as she drove off. 

Trouble. She was definitely trouble.


	4. Exposed

A week. A whole week gone since Doc...Eve...Cornered him in the alley way. And still not a word exchanged between them. A verbal standoff. Neither willing to give in first. It was a bluff. A well practiced ruse. Drop some bait and wait for the mouse to get curious. 

He was no mouse and whatever she offered, he wanted none of. 

The fireplace glowed green with a letter, dropping to the floor. The only person to write him was Minerva, her loop and scrawl handwriting familiar

"Severus,   
I know you are taking time away but the infirmary is running low on medicines. Half the student body has come down with a mysterious illness. High fever, vomiting, and rash. Could you please brew some flu potions? 

\- Minerva" 

Sighing, he prepped for an all-nighter. The Master he recommended to Minerva was more than adequate but a sudden onslaught of sickness could wipe out any infirmary. He would make the potions after his shift at the bar.

Eve watched him with the well trained eye of an eagle. Nothing said. Just watching. It annoyed him. He just wanted her to accuse him of something. To tell him that she knew he was a wizard. Looking closer as he slid her drink across the bar, he noticed her eyes tinted purple spoke of little sleep or overwork. Or both. She leaned her head against the wall, messy top knot of toffee brown hair, harried and unkempt. 

"Would you like a pillow?" he asked sardonically 

Her eyes fluttered open, two little parentheses between the eyebrows, scowl set to match his own, words flowing out like lava ready to consume the unsuspecting village at the bottom. 

"I have been awake for seventy two hours. I have seen ten people die in a pool of their own blood because of some weird virus for which we don't have a diagnosis. I haven't eaten because I throw up because I'm so fucking tired. My father called to parade my brother's promotion in front of me since I was medically discharged from the military, and now you're giving me shit for taking a breath in the one place that I can relax" 

Luckily he had skill in a straight face. That sounded horrendous. He almost felt bad for teasing her. He had no idea the strain on her life. Deciding to take a turn from his norm of silence and sarcasm, he leaned over the bar apologetically 

"I'm sorry" 

Her shoulders drooped and a hand held onto her temple 

"I must look awful if you're being nice to me now...It's fine. I'm just tired" 

Reaching under the counter for his emergency supply, he picked up a vial of pepper up potion and a vial of dreamless sleep that he handed to her 

"Take this one before bed. Then this one in the morning" 

She eyed them skeptically, sniffing the contents with the utmost suspicion

"So should I just take this on your word? That this isn't drugged? That I won't die after I drink it? That it's legal?" 

He shrugged, her suspicion not bothering him in the slightest. He knew his skill. 

"It won't bother me. But you're the one who needs the sleep. Take it or don't" 

"You're kind of a dick Sev" she threw at him, pocketing the vials nonetheless 

"And yet you still come here every night and talk to me" he snapped, turning his back to her to make a drink 

"One has very few actual choices in this life..." she muttered conspiratorially as she heaved herself off the chair 

He knew this game. Shame. Fear. Pouty eyed sadness. 

"I won't feel bad for you" he stated over his shoulder 

Lifting herself up onto the bar with nothing but her hands, she growled at him like a feral dog 

"I didn't ask you to" and stomped out of the bar, the crowd instantly parting after that display 

About that part, she was right. What was actually in the realm of control was next to nothing. Control was nothing but illusion. People weren't even in control of their own bodies. Better to acknowledge the frailty up front and work from there. 

His brain skipped back to the note that Minerva wrote him, students falling ill of a mysterious sickness. It seemed much too similar in its diagnosis to be coincidence. He was no epidemiologist, but he could spot a pattern. It needed research. 

After closing, he enjoyed the night air before he walked into his building. Lock tumbling, familiar and heavy. So ordinary. Everything that life wasn't before. Before the war. Before his career. Before it all...

As he turned on the light, he couldn't help but gasp. 

In his chair sat Doc. Calm. Collected. Smirking. 

"Shall I make you some tea?" he asked smoothly, heart hammering 

"What were you thinking giving these to me?" she asked him, holding up the vials

"That they are an herbal remedy and maybe I was trying to help you not be a miserable wretch. I guess I shouldn't exert that effort next time" he spoke bluntly, furious that she somehow made it into his apartment 

"We both know that's not true" she mused, arching her eyebrow and crossing her arms 

"You speak of knowing things. So confident in your ideas yet you never say any of them. I think you don't know anything at all. You're just fishing for information about me because you're too afraid to ask" he taunted, sitting down on the coffee table in front of her 

Smiling wickedly, she lunged forward and pushed up his left sleeve, gripping the faded dark mark...It would never leave. 

"Death Eater" she announced proudly as her nails dug into his forearm 

His blood ran cold, ice flooding his veins. It would be so easy to wipe her memories. This moment need not ever have happened. They could go back to life as normal. He could clear her mind. That would be invasive. A possible overreaction. He needed to figure out what she knew and why first.

He held back his words. She didn't say Death Eater with contempt. She sounded proud that she figured him out. He may have been a death eater at one time, but as the years passed he realized that he wasn't. Nothing he believed in coincided with their virtues, if one could even call them virtues. 

"You're wrong" he finally answered firmly, standing up and pulling his arm back from her grip 

"I know what that sign means" she pressed, nonplussed at his denial 

"Anyone can know what a sign means. But you would have to know the wearer to know the truth" he replied coolly 

"Semantics" she shrugged, looking up at him, still seated 

"You know so much about me. Who are you?" he looked down his nose at her, crossing his arms 

"An ally" she answered confidently 

"I'm alone. I don't need allies" he told her shortly, moving to look out the balcony door away from her weighted gaze 

"It's cute that you really think you're alone. After all this time and everything that you've done. You really think you could escape anywhere and be invisible?" she laughed, pulling out several papers and graphs 

Curiosity getting the best of him, he snatched up the papers. Sightings of him, dates and times, handwritten notes, lists of his activities. Forcing himself to remain calm, he handed them back to her. Who was following him and for what purpose? 

He could be gone by morning. 

"Get out" he ordered, summoning all his energy into his voice 

"Don't be mad. It's a good thing. You're wanted. By the right kind of people now" she stood up, palms out 

"I don't know who you are and I don't care. I don't want to help anyone. I don't want to get involved in anything. I just want to be alone" he barked, dangerously close to losing it 

"Why do you think Hank gave you a job? Some man he just happened to meet off the street? Why do you think you've been hidden from all publicity? Do you really think no one cares about you? That no one needs your expertise? You're wrong" she raised her voice defiantly, stepping into his space 

Lemongrass and basil. 

"Get. Out" he growled through bared teeth 

Yes. Gone by morning. 

"You can repay your debt with us Severus" she grabbed his hands, squeezing them expectantly 

A spark soared up within him burning white hot. He didn't owe a damn thing to anyone. His debt was repaid. He almost died for guilt and penance. Never again. He lived for himself now. 

"I don't owe anyone a damn thing. I have spent my life trying to get absolution. And the last thing that you get to do is try and make me feel guilty. I don't even know nor do I care who you are! GET OUT!" he raised his voice, arm out to the door 

Flinching before straightening her shoulders, she shoved her shoulder into his chest as she stormed past him. 

"I am Eve Breathwaite. Special Forces Combat Medic. Recipient of the Silver Star with acts of valor. Doctor. Muggle. Member of the Muggle and Magical International Alliance. You know where to find me tomorrow if you want to talk. If you choose to run away, I'll find you. I don't back down from a mission" she told him confidently and calmly as she slammed the door shut. 

He began to pack up his belongings. He was no ones mission.


	5. M.I.A.

Doc

"How did it go?" Hank asked her the next morning, pouring a cup of coffee as thick as jet fuel

She sighed. Not as well as she had hoped. But not terrible. She could tell he was intrigued, he would come around once he got his bearings. 

"He told me he wanted nothing to do with it and made me leave" 

Hank chuckled, summoning the sugar over to the bar. The doors locked and shades drawn, it was safe to use magic. 

"He will come around. What upset him?" Hank asked, spooning sugar into his mug 

"I tried a bad tactic. I told him he could pay off his debt with us...He got really mad" she admitted, annoyed that she didn't get him to crack 

"Ah. Well, his debt is already paid off. He saved Harry Potter. A double agent for twenty years. Definitely a bad choice but you had to give it a shot" Hank shrugged, leaning back in his chair

"I don't understand why he didn't just leave. That kid had the whole magical world on his side, right?" she asked curiously, the details of the wizarding war a bit murky still 

"That's not for me to explain. But I do know he is loyal. Which is why we need him" Hank answered shortly, looking up as the door opened with the key.   
********************************************

Severus 

He made the decision to leave. Flee into the night and away from anyone who threatened him. Boxes packed and ready to disappear. Build a new existence abroad. Pride held him back. He was no coward. He would square up to fight and face whatever challenges were presented to him. 

No. He wouldn't run away. He held too much integrity for that. Plus, what could a Muggle woman do to him? What sort of powers could she possibly hold that would threaten his life? It was a joke. It had to be. 

He opened the door to the bar, hoping Hank would be there to discuss the previous night. 

"Hello Severus" his supposed friend called, waving him over to the seat next to Doc 

Narrowing his eyes, he sat next to her, suspicious.

"See, I told you he was mad at me" she told Hank gesturing at him with her shoulder 

"I don't blame him. Why did you have to break into his apartment to have that discussion?" Hank asked neutrally, pushing a cup of coffee towards him

"If you two could stop making a joke out of my life I would appreciate it" he spoke measuredly, rage boiling in his gut, the coffee bitter and thick 

"Our conversation didn't go as I planned. That was my fault" Doc explained, regret coloring her voice 

"What was your original plan? To guilt me into whatever cock-eyed idea you had? To use whatever misinformation you could get on me to wrangle me in? I've been guilted into submission my whole life and it will not work anymore. Do not lie to me" he growled, the rage barely contained, his hands cold and clammy

Hank leaned over, palms up in truce

"I knew who you were. I'm a wizard. Born from two No-Maj parents. I studied at Ilvermorny. I lived in both worlds. It was strange, splitting my time between them. I rose up the ranks in the American magical government, and I was invited to become part of a highly secretive society" 

Severus arched his eyebrow, eyes bouncing between the two of them, responding drily 

"The Muggle and Magical International Alliance?" 

"Good memory" Hank commented before continuing 

"The society formed during World War Two, the whole world had to come together. The MIA was formed by an American General Wayne Robertson and an English Auror Jean Woods. Jean saved Wayne's life by magic in the battlefield of Belgium. It is a well kept secret between the magical Aurors and Muggle militaries.

Perhaps the best kept secret. The two armies agreed that only during times of extreme mortal peril would the magical and Muggle worlds be able to work together. In very small groups. Highly controlled and selectively chosen. The governments turn a blind eye. There is no paper trail and nothing except verbal agreements handed down through the generations" 

Sitting back, Severus tried to process this but came up with nothing but plot holes

"A secret society? That no one has heard of, and there is no way to verify. What constitutes mortal peril?" he asked sharply, slipping into their minds for proof 

"We have strict guidelines we follow. It is all explained once someone accepts an invitation" Hank assured him 

"What about the secrecy statute? This violates every aspect of it" 

"The Muggles take a blood vow that if they do anything to reveal the magical world, the consequence is death..." Doc told him somberly, holding out her arm 

Hank touched her wrist, and a flutter of golden light swirled around them as she continued 

"Hank is my bonder. He invited me into the MIA. If I do anything to reveal the magical world, we both die. It is not only my life at stake but his too. I don't take that lightly. I didn't approach you carelessly, despite what you may think. Hank told me to, he has done his research" 

Anger surged to his fingertips. People planning life, his life, without his consent. As if he was a chess piece again. Thinking they could entice him into another war. Another conquest. 

"I'm not entering into your society. You did all this without my consent. You tracked me. Baited me with a job. Lied to me. I've had enough lies and secrecy to last three lifetimes. I'm a free man now. I have no duty" he seethed, violated from head to toe 

"I'm not asking you to join us Severus. I only wish to have your help with the current task at hand" Hank spoke in his normal gravel voice, somehow that eased his mind

"What task would that be?" he asked cautiously, not intending to help 

"A sickness is tearing through whole communities. Magical and Muggle alike. The governments are trying to keep it quiet to prevent panic...But it won't be contained much longer" Doc explained to him, the worry evident in her voice 

His mind flashed back to Minerva's letter. The students were falling ill. Soon, the staff would. Then the Ministry. Their world was far too new to handle a pandemic as well as restructuring after the war. It would be chaos. 

That wasn't his fault. He didn't have any reason to help. He could travel and do as he pleased. There were other Masters and Mistresses to help not to mention whole hospital staffs full of Healers. They surely could find a cure, he was only one person.

He wouldn't make any difference. He just wanted to disappear. But...a small voice in the back of his brain spoke softly...You're not the same man as before this war. You've changed. You believe in the cause now. The cause for the good...

"Why do you need me? Surely I'm not the only one you can ask" he asked measuredly, trying to sense the situation and intentions 

"There are others, but none as qualified. You know how to make medicine, and I know the body. I need a partner that I can trust. Someone determined. You don't need to decide right now. But soon, people are dying fast. It's mutating as it spreads" Doc told him, her eyes wide and earnest, imploring. 

Sighing, he felt the resolve give way. He had gone soft. He could only envision Minerva as she tried to rally the staff and students. All those dunderheads that he despised for years and years...The society that scorned him but then held him up on a pedestal, all gone. He couldn't let it happen. Not after he gave his life to save it. He was far too stubborn and prideful for that. It may not be the most noble of intentions but it was something. 

The faintest glimmer could get anyone through if that's what they chose to focus on. 

"Tell me what you need me to do" he said with a heavy breath out, rubbing his temple 

This wasn't how he expected his life to be.


	6. First Meeting

"Don't touch anything" he warned her as they walked through his greenhouse hidden amongst the woods behind the apartment building. 

Eve rolled her eyes, making a show of crossing her arms in front of her chest. He liked it better when she didn't speak to him. Her attitude could be comparable to his and he wasn't sure there was enough room for two of them in this world. 

"You're like a mad scientist" she offered, eyes bouncing between the different herbs and flowers 

"I am a world renowned potions master. Not a mad scientist. Nothing about me is mad. Except the fact that I'm following you around" he retorted back, her presence getting under his skin, making his teeth clench 

"It's been a few days since I broke in. I thought you'd be over it by now" she explained with a shrug 

His jaw tightened as he forced a calming breath through his nose. He wasn't over it. His life being orchestrated by invisible strings. Even now. 

"No. I am not 'over it.' Honestly I'm just beginning, and you should be prepared for that. I'm helping you until we find a lead. Then I'm giving it to someone else" he informed her curtly, picking some mugwort with his wand, placing it in a jar 

"So I can look forward to your stellar personality for the foreseeable future?" she teased, leaning over his arm to see the small leaves 

"This isn't funny. I'm not enjoying this. You tricked me. Don't take it so lightly" he chastised her, refusing to let her believe they would be friends 

"Get over yourself. You're not the first person to be lied to in the name of doing the right thing" she said with more than a tinge of annoyance 

She had no clue what he lived through. The days spent in paralyzing fear that he would forget something, some small detail, and the whole plan would be flushed down the drain. Harry would be dead and the dark lord in charge. And he, stuck in his position of power. Forever labeled a traitor. 

"This is mugwort. It increases liver function to rid toxins out of the body. We can try this first. I will make a simple brew to see if it can alleviate symptoms. How will you be able to get this passed along to Muggles?" he informed her, questioning the next step 

Looking up at him cautiously she replied

"We might have to try it on the magical community first...They trust your knowledge" 

"You want me to use my community as test subjects? Before passing it along to you? You want me to use whatever shred of honor and pull is associated with my name and use it to get this medicine safety tested?!" he bellowed, the last of his patience gone 

"Yes" she stood up straighter, facing her body towards him, steeling for a fight 

Gripping the counter, he silently counted to ten. Then ten again. He couldn't very well let students die, or anyone for that matter. Not after what their world had already been through. 

"You may stand down, or whatever it is they say. I'm not going to hurt you. Unlike what the word on the street is, I don't enjoy inflicting pain" he sighed, rubbing his temple in resignation 

"We're partners. You're not my superior" she argued, body relaxing 

"Sure as hell doesn't feel like that. I need to know the whole plan. I will not be left in the dark. Then, I will call you partner" he demanded, the smell of simmering plants filling the air 

Silently she stood, watching as he prepared the beginning stages of the potion. Chop, mince, pestle, grind, boil. 

"How do I know I can trust you?" she finally asked, seated herself on the opposing countertop. 

"No one ever fully knows if they can trust or not. They simply go forward in expectancy that their judgment was correct. You either come forward or you leave" he shrugged, tossing a casual glance over his shoulder 

"They didn't tell me you were a pretentious philosopher too" she rolled her eyes, settling back against the wall 

Biting back an unexpected smile, he supposed she was going to stay.

"I knew it. You like me" she chirped from behind his back 

"I wouldn't go that far" he cut her off, the steam beginning to curl heavily

"You don't have many friends do you?" she switched the conversation, attempting to keep him confused 

She needled him in order to get under his skin. That subject bothered him. More than any other. The spot where he still managed to feel pain. Lack of connection. Friendship. Social ostracism defined his life, mostly for things out of his control. Poverty, abuse, scandal. He didn't want to let her think she won. But there was the possibility that if he offered her some semblance of vulnerability, that she would share her plan. That he could get more useful information out of her than what the gave. 

"No. I don't. And it doesn't bother me. I've lived a solitary life. It's easier that way" he admitted, purposely not looking her in the eye 

"Don't you get lonely?" she asked, purposely neutral

Loneliness was a part of his life. A constant burning ache. Rationalizing the fact that no one wanted to be around him with the knowledge that he had high standards of who to permit left a life permeated with solitude. He told himself he didn't care. Refusing to even entertain the fact that someone might want to spend time with him. 

"It's difficult to be lonely when you have never experienced any friendship to which you can compare the lack" he quipped, rolling his eyes for added acerbity.

"Well now I just feel like an ass..." she muttered with a sigh 

"If the shoe fits..." was his last reply, ignoring her as he continued to brew the mugwort 

He didn't care if she stayed, but she wouldn't learn anything about him.

A few hours passed by in silence. Him, purposely ignoring her presence and she reading up on infectious disease and pathogens. She lay on her stomach, relaxed and possibly even at ease. But when she opened her mouth, she only tried to set him off. To see which button would cause him to detonate. He didn't like to feel as if he was a lab experiment. 

"You know I read so much about you. Hundreds of interviews given by your students or your old colleagues, the interviews you gave to the press. You came off as very taciturn and sage. But in real life, you're kind of jumpy and brash. Which one is the real Severus?" she questioned him as she stood up and stretched, top lifting to expose her navel. 

Those interviews were staged. Carefully planned out and executed. The only thing that bound him and the Golden Trio together was their decision to keep the secret plans of Albus Dumbledore securely under lock and key. Of course he appeared different. He cultivated personas based on what he needed. How safe he felt. And right now, that safety level was near zero. 

"Don't believe everything you read. Only what you experience yourself. I'm going to deliver these to Minerva at Hogwarts. I take it you are coming with me?" he shut down her inquisition, knowing that she would need to come in order to get more information about the sickness firsthand. 

"Don't sound so enthused. I bring really good snacks" she teased, working at digging her way into his good graces with boastful American wit that some found charming. 

Not him. Never him. 

"You've apparated before I take it" he stated as he held out his elbow to her 

"No. Brooms and fireplaces" she said with a nervous twitch, glancing around for some means of physical transportation. 

"Hold on tightly to my arm. And don't let go. Otherwise you'll end up half here and half there. We've got several stops to make before we get to Hogwarts and I don't want to be picking up your body parts" he informed her gravely, fighting down a smile at her appalled expression 

This would be fun and due repayment of her incessant picking.


	7. A Return to Hogwarts

Quebec, Canada. 

The halfway point between Denver and London. Apparition became infinitely more dangerous the further the distance, especially with an attached flyer. 

They landed in a small patch of woods that he used to pick up a specific brand of mushrooms for an anti-anxiety potion. He let go of Doc's arm, and she valiantly stood her ground, throat trembling as she swallowed down the vomit. 

Such pride. It almost made him want to like her. 

"You know most people vomit their first trip. There's nothing wrong with that" he told her, looking down at the ground 

"I'm not most people. I'll be fine" she spoke slowly, balancing herself on a nearby pine tree 

"You'll feel better if you just let it happen" he took a swig of water from his flask, eyebrow hitched as she gulped in air as if she was drowning 

"God damn it..." she swore, the last convulsion doubling her over, projectile vomit at least a foot in every direction 

Pulling out an anti-nausea potion, he tossed it to her, surprised that she drank it without performing her usual inquisition.

"Impressive distance" he remarked drily as she leaned her back against the tree with her eyes squeezed shut 

"Shut up" she muttered grouchily, wiping her chin roughly 

"We have two more rounds to go so once you get it together, we'll shove off" he informed her, drinking a pepper up potion

"I'm not even going to ask how this is possible. Let's do it" came the reply, sneaker clad feet clomping over, grabbing his elbow hastily 

She had grit, he had to hand that to her. Even if she was faking it, the fact she didn't want to seem weak meant something to him. She needed to prove her strength which meant something had happened where she hadn't been the portrait of fearlessness. The spy in him wanted to find it out. 

Making certain that her arm was clasped in his, he disapparated to the back corner of the Leaky Cauldron. Her breath came in a big gasp, but she held herself up this time, reorienting quickly.

"Welcome to London" he dropped her arm as people began to mill around them 

"Bustling place for being hidden in a wall"she commented, looking around at the commotion 

"Severus! Round on the house for the war hero!" the bartender called out to him, floating over two pints to the small table. 

They needed to get to the school. Good company was often fickle. All it took was one bad attitude or errant spell from a vengeful ex-death eater and he would be gone. 

An idea dawned on him as he turned to her almost accusatorially 

"Wait. How can you see this. It's guarded by magic" 

Digging around in her pocket, she produced a crumpled sheet of blank paper. Curiously, he held his wand to it as the writing began to appear

"According to the statutes verbally agreed upon by the world governments, we, the undersigned authorities behind the Muggle and Magical International Alliance, hereby give permission for Muggle, Eve Breathwaite, to be able to view and attend all magical communities and their locations with the exact same privileges as wizards and witches. The bonder will face inescapable consequences should Eve Breathwaite break any statutes of secrecy" 

He stared at the paper, mind blown at the secrets within the magical world that passed over him so stealthily. A bit of anger flared up, triggered by the fact that he was used to having things hidden from him and now was no different. Even after the war. Handing the paper back to her, he took a long sip from the chilled glass. 

"Being a war hero isn't all it's cracked up to be..." she muttered, half of her pint glass gone, surveying the scene vigilantly 

"It's nothing spectacular. Not with what I have to live with" he blurted out accidentally, pretending not to see the stares and whispers of onlookers

He hadn't been back to London since the press tour and he hadn't intended to come back. Ever. And this unwanted attention only reinforced that decision. 

"Let's finish these fast. I feel like that group of people is going to come over soon and ask you questions" she warned him, gesturing with her chin at the curious clan of women fussing amongst themselves behind them 

Good idea. He was in no mood to answer questions or play nice to anyone who would have sold him out during the war. Slugging back the rest of the beer, they scurried to the corner and disapparated. 

They landed near the edge of the grounds, where the carriages met the students. It was less showy than the front of the castle, less intimidating to someone who wasn't used to magic. At least, that's what he assumed. 

"This is spooky" she commented, taking in the surroundings skeptically 

"It wards off the faint of heart. Follow me" he explained, the familiar grip of stern mannerisms and steel emotions overtaking him 

Nothing calm and easy about life here. Everything exact and measured. All things filled with purpose and intent. It wasn't safe to show himself here as he truly was; a man simply wanting to live a life of soft quiet peace. Here, he was harsh and sharp. The potions master who murdered a man; the fact that it was out of mercy mattered not. The professor who traumatized students. The man whose blood ran so cold, water turned to ice in his presence.

"You hate it here. You really don't want to be back" she commented a few minutes later as they came up to the doors of the castle 

Obviously. He never wanted to return. Every awful memory he had in his mind took place at this damn castle. It was his purgatory. And yet, here he was. Back again. 

"It seems my whole life has been chosen for me again. We all do things we don't want to for some purpose of the greater good. Right?" he threw back at her, if not a tad sharper than necessary 

Her eyes clouded, inner cheek bitten. He hit a nerve and it stung. Good. Maybe she would leave him alone after this "mission" ended. 

"Oh Professor Snape! Good to see you back!" Nearly Headless Nick greeted him as he slipped through the stone wall

"Hello again. Could you please tell Minerva that I'm here for our meeting" he asked the old ghost courteously

"Of course. You will be wanting to put a bubble charm over your body. There's a raging sickness running about the castle" Nick told him, slipping back through the wall 

"Was that a ghost?" Doc asked, forcing her voice level 

"Yes. Don't ask why he's nearly headless unless you want to see entrails...I'm going to put a charm on you so you're safe from whatever is in there, ready?" he explained brusquely, pointing his wand at her not waiting for a response

A bubble appeared, encasing her in a tight film but not prohibiting movement. It wasn't an everyday, garden variety spell but it served its purpose. He turned the wand on himself, the comforting second skin covering his body. 

The doors flung open suddenly and Minerva glided out, regal shoulders and straight back, ushering them both inside quickly 

"Oh Severus I am so glad you came. I don't trust anyone but you to brew me something capable of keeping this sickness at bay. And who did you bring? I'm Minerva McGonagall, headmistress" the elder witch introduced herself to Eve, who glanced at him as if to ask how to proceed

"This is Doctor Eve Breathwaite. My companion" he answered carefully, uncertain of what the rules were surrounding the society 

"I have been sent a letter explaining who she is by the ministry; I simply wanted to ascertain her validity. Come on inside then" Minerva stepped back, allowing them to pass through. 

Doc stared at the walls, eyes massive and skeptical at the subjects in the portraits moving about lazily, the ever shifting staircase, and the low chatter of hundreds of teenagers echoing off the brick and mortar. 

"Follow me please to the infirmary" Minerva commanded, already halfway up the hall 

As he walked, students careened out of his path, remembering him from the days pre-war. Many of them would only remember him as the traitorous headmaster while some who came back for a re-take of their last year would remember him as the dark and angry Potions master. Or the dungeon bat, as he knew they called him. The thought pained him, weighing down his soul like a brick sinking to the ocean floor. 

He didn't want that to be his legacy. Pain and suffering. But he had no idea how to fix it. 

"What the hell did you do to these kids? It's like they're looking at a..." Doc spouted off, but then quickly cut herself off, eyes to the ground

"Like they're looking at a murderer" he finished for her glibly, the sight of calm and thorough Poppy a reprieve to his thoughts 

"Oh Severus! I'm so glad to see you again. Perhaps we can get some decent potions to re-stock my stores while you are here?" Poppy asked hopefully, looking around at the three of them 

"I came to drop off some mugwort detoxifying potion, and I will certainly stay for the next day or so to check on it's potency. In that time, I can brew for you Poppy, if it is alright with Minerva and whoever has taken over the Potions post" he answered, a tug of pride pulling in his chest at the bright eyes of his old colleague 

"Of course. Professor Key opted not to take the dungeon room, so that is open to you Severus for however long you choose to stay. He also gave his explicit deference to you whenever you needed the lab" Minerva told him, a wistful smile on her face 

"Could I please ask what types of symptoms the students are having?" Doc spoke up gently, looking around at the nearly full infirmary 

The two witches exchanged a quick glance, but motioned for them to follow to a bed in the corner. A student lay charmed asleep, limbs twitching in small and jumpy movements; skin flushed and red, breathing shallow and rattled. Doc pulled a stethoscope out of her bag, leaning over the sleeping body, eyebrows scrunched together in concern. 

"How did it get to this?" she asked neutrally, listening to the next student, the second magical skin bending beneath her touch 

"They come in with a fever. Vomiting. And then a purple blister forms on their chest. They start twitching and unable to speak because they lose control of their body. We charm them asleep to keep them comfortable. We haven't yet figured out anything to keep the blister from forming, because after it forms their spasms seem to get worse" Poppy told them in a rush, wringing her hands nervously 

He handed her the vials filled with goldenrod yellow liquid, a cold nervousness creeping through his system at the fact that this would be administered to a student and he had no idea what would happen because he didn't know what he was supposed to be treating. He didn't want more needless blood on his hands. 

"This is simple mugwort. It should remove toxins if they are present. I need a place to start" he explained, hoping that he sounded more convinced than he actually was 

"Doctor, there is a spare room on the second floor for you. Anything you need we can get for you" Minerva turned her attention to Eve with a kind smile 

"I think she should stay in the downstairs Minerva. I am in charge of her safety and secrecy; it would be prudent to keep her close" he spoke up grimly, trying his best to make it seem like he didn't care, only wanting to keep his professional duty. 

"I'm not a puppy, I don't need looked after" Doc groused at him, arms folded tightly against her chest 

"You don't know magic and you don't know anyone here besides me. You are my responsibility, like it or not. I don't want to be in front of the Wizengamot again for someone else's death. They'll send me straight off to Azkaban this time and I rather like being able to see the sky" he bit back coldly, shifting his eyes away as Minerva shuddered.

Doc pouted at him, following as they descended the stairs to the dungeons, the air cooling considerably the further they went, the moss and tang of mildew stinging his nose in vicious nostalgia. 

Upon entering the master suite, he found the common room set with their belongings and the one bedroom door already split into two separate rooms. Sighing deeply, he turned to Doc, making certain to look into her eyes

"I'm not trying to box you into corners. I need you to understand that my life in this castle has been filled with nothing but loss, death, and pain. And now I am back, amidst a raging unknown pandemic, with a Muggle no less who has no way of defending herself against dangerous magic that she cannot see. You are my responsibility now as much as you think we are partners. As much as you think you are all powerful and strong, here, you are not. I need you to believe me on this" 

Instead of bucking up and spewing back defensively, her eyes softened, clear half moons, eyes that he at one point daydreamed about. 

"Do you still hear the screams Severus?" she asked, slight wobble to her voice 

"Yes I do. All the time" he replied in an attempt to get her to trust him, hating the vulnerability 

A small glimpse into his life for her belief in his abilities to keep her safe. She nodded slowly, giving his hand a quick squeeze before disappearing into her bedroom for the night. 

His chest hurt already and this was only the beginning.


	8. Midnight in the Forest

Mortars blasted through the air, screams of wounded men and women, the blood from other staining her uniform. The soldiers fell back but she had to go forward. That was her job. 

"Medic?" a soft voice whispered from under some rubble 

The blood crackled in his lungs, a trickle coming out the soldiers mouth. He would die out here. 

"I'm here. I'll take you back to camp" she told him calmly, pressing down on the gunshot wound on his chest 

"We both know I'm dead. Make sure my daughter knows" he choked out before gasping and falling still. 

She had screamed that time. Anger at the sky. A void that couldn't contain her rage. So much needless death. Calling for an air vac, she waited by his side, pistol poised to take out any further attacks. 

No human should ever have to do this to another human. 

Eve woke up sweaty, pillows and sheets tossed around the room. Post traumatic stress disorder is what the doctors said. What the therapists worked her through. But to her, it was a continual dark cloud. Having a diagnosis meant nothing if she couldn't live in peace. 

The first two weeks at Hogwarts threw her for a loop. Rogue spells ran through the halls, nearly knocking her off her feet. The professors treated her skeptically as an outsider; especially as an outsider paired up with Severus. The stairs moved, leaving her stranded for over an hour while Severus fumed that she wasn't nearby to help him take vitals and check symptoms. The house elves beckoned to her every whim, with delightful servitude; which she didn't enjoy. She chatted with Pearl, the elf designated to her room, every night. 

Severus' demeanor hadn't improved. If anything he was getting more surly. He could pretend all he wanted that he hated everyone, but no one who truly hated in their soul would stay and brew continuous potions in an attempt to save students' lives. He got easily frustrated because nothing worked. The students were deteriorating, bodies losing weight as they lay in bed unable to move. The magical hospital wouldn't take them because their sickness had yet to be diagnosed and they didn't want to risk the spread.

A heavy knock came at the door. Looking out the window, she posited the time to be around two am; the sky ink black and burning with stars. 

"Come in" she yelled, picking up the debris from her unconscious freak out 

Severus walked in carefully, surveying the scene with one eyebrow lifted before remarking quietly 

"You were screaming at the top of your lungs. Pearl woke me up in a fright" 

Poor elf. She had no idea what life with a non-magical human looked like. 

"I'll apologize to her in the morning. Sorry she woke you" Eve said, too tired and worn out to be sarcastic 

A knowing glance passed over Severus' face as he magically tidied up her room with a swish. Ten minutes worth of work done in a flash. 

"Nightmares" he stated, settling into an arm chair near the fireplace which still housed glowing orange embers 

She could lie. Tell him it was none of his smug business. She was still mad at him for how he treated her. Like a bother. An underling. Not worthy of respect. But it would serve no purpose. They were both in the trenches again. 

And her body bore the weight of exhaustion. 

"Yes. Just like every night" she admitted, sitting in the chair beside him

"I could make you a potion" he offered flatly, his pajama bottoms oddly out of place on his body 

She shook her head. She didn't need drugs or potions. She just needed the memories to stop. Not that they would. Ten years had passed and they were still as fresh as when she stepped off that field. 

"I don't need to. I can handle it" she spoke proudly, defiant even. 

"That's why you scream in your sleep every night then? Because you're handling it so well?" he asked wryly, resting against the soft backed chair 

How did he know? Before she could ask he continued 

"These walls, despite being stone are relatively thin...And while you relive the worst parts of your life in your sleep, I run from mine in the form of insomnia. I spend most nights in our common room reading..." he admitted to her, rubbing his temples 

She didn't know that. He never told her and he was never there when she woke in the mornings. That could explain his less than glorious temperament if he never slept. 

"Then why don't you take the potion?" she asked curiously, careful not to lace her words with accusation 

With a defeated shrug of his shoulders he answered 

"I would rather face my demons head on. Even if I lose. Which I'm certain you understand" 

Yes. She did. The silence surrounded them for several minutes, heavy and deafening until she recalled something she read earlier in the day 

"I was reading about a certain plant from a magical horticulture book that I found in the library. It said these small tubers only bloom during the waxing crescent moon and are deeply hidden beneath 'forbidden' Scottish soil. They're very rare and apparently guarded by "wings of the living dead." Is that something that we can work with?" she told Severus, completely uncertain of anything she just said. 

Magical plants were not akin to muggle plants and their uses far outweighed the medicinal efforts of anything she had ever picked in her backyard. 

Severus leaned forward suddenly, hands on his knees, voice sounding a bit...hopeful 

"Did the text specifically say forbidden soil?" 

Nodding, she reached to the table beside her and handed him the book open to the page. Eyebrows furrowed, his deep brown eyes scanned the page rapidly, wheels turning. Snapping the book shut, he suddenly paced across the room to look out her window. 

"It's the waxing crescent! This book is all about rare and fabled plants on the Hogwarts grounds! We need to go to the Forbidden Forest! Now! Get dressed and meet me as soon as you can" he rumbled, his usually slow and methodical movements now fast and jerky. 

Taking a deep breath, unaware of what she was about to walk into, she got dressed. It was better than tossing and turning for another four hours. If it could make Severus seem hopeful, that was something indeed. 

As they walked down out of the castle, the portraits slept soundly and their footsteps echoed off the deeply entrenched walls. The castle was equal parts glorious and terrifying. 

"Where are we going?" she eventually asked as they made their way across the school grounds, grass slick with dew, slipping on a leaf, the ground moving beneath her foot 

Severus reached out his arm and grasped her elbow tightly, easily restoring her balance while he answered gruffly 

"The Forbidden Forest exists here on Hogwarts grounds. It is a sanctuary of sorts for all types of fabled creatures and outcasted beings. They have a rule not to leave the forest and we have a rule that only certain people can come in. We will meet Firenze at the entrance, he will give you his permission, or not, to enter" 

Fabled creatures? They couldn't truly exist if they were fabled? Then again, nothing in the magical world truly made sense; existing within the world but being anything but ordinary. Breaking laws of physics and confirming so many things that children believed but were talked out of. 

Magic was real. 

The entrance to the forest loomed dark in front of them, trees waving back and forth eerily slowly in the wind. The soft thunder of hoofs drew her attention to a large half man half horse creature. Her mouth gaped open, unabashedly staring at this truly mythical creature standing in front of her, existing just as if in a book. And he looked distrustfully upon her. 

"Master Snape, you have returned. Your deeds have long been praised in the forest. You are always welcome. Your friend, however, I don't know her..." 

Firenze stepped closer, leaning down to her face, eyes the size of golf balls staring down into her soul. She stared back, she was no coward. He spoke to Severus, voice still and cutting 

"Your friend is a healer. However, she has taken lives. Death weighs heavy on her soul, that seems appropriate. No magic though. I can only assume you have a very good reason for bringing her here?" 

Severus nodded, answering back factually 

"She is a healer; special ministry permission to be here due to the unforeseen circumstances amongst the students. A rare sickness is spreading and we are ill equipped to handle it. We read about a tuber plant that grows in forbidden soil. It may help us save the students because nothing else has, as of yet. Do we have your permission to enter the Forest to look?" 

Firenze stared between the two of them, assessing their intentions before nodding to his back 

"Climb on. I'll take you to where you need to go, but be warned, it is a dangerous plant and won't be taken easily"

Her arms grasped tightly around his neck...or mane, they began to fly through the forest, trees flying past. Even with all the surroundings overwhelming her vision, she felt Severus' hands rest on her hips. Whether he did that for his own pleasure or for safety, she didn't know. But she did nothing to stop it.

A clearing emerged from the woods, and Firenze stopped abruptly in the middle. As she slid down to the mossy forest ground he warned them ominously 

"This Forest is unforgiving. Be careful and quick to leave"

With a heavy gallop, he left them alone in the pitch black of the forest. Heart hammering, she closed her eyes and zoned in on the sounds. Crickets, leaves, tree branches creaking, water off in the distance...something watching. 

"We aren't alone. We never are in the forest. Let's dig quickly, tubers usually grow about a foot down and are easy to pull" Severus whispered in a rush, his all black ensemble and dark hair easily blending into the surroundings. 

Mint and moss. 

The hairs on her neck stood on end as she dug quickly, the warm earth falling away from her fingers. An eerily soothing air rushed around her nostrils, and she realized it was coming from the ground. 

"Cover your mouth. There's poison" she spoke sharply to Severus, pushing his arm. 

He nodded once, muttering an incantation, the pale pink light surrounding them both. Instantly her mind cleared and the vigilance returned. 

"I've found several tubers, they're coming away easily. Which I'm certain means something bad" he announced calmly, nose close to the ground 

A soft high pitched whistling pierced through the air but Severus made no move. It reminded her of the aftermath of a fast plane. Grabbing a large fallen limb from beside her, she stood up, muscles tensed for the incoming object. A rush of flutter descended upon Severus but not before she jumped in front of his crouched body, assuredly swinging the heavy branch and making solid contact with what looked like three foot tall extra furry bats. Five or six of them began to swarm but her reflexes quickly took them up on the challenge, expertly smacking them away before they regrouped. 

Severus held his wand out, bright light emitting from the tip as the bats scattered and the night fell silent again. Heart racing and palms beginning to sweat, she took a few deep breaths as he explained with annoyance

"Vampire bats...It would have been terribly ironic if they had gotten me" 

Real vampire bats? With the ability to actually turn a person to a vampire? Her mind jumped back to the text "wings of living death." 

"Why would it be ironic?" she asked with a slight wobble to her voice, still absorbing the fact that she narrowly escaped damned immortality. 

"Never mind. We need to get back. I have several tubers. I'll apparate us back, which would have been beneficial as a professor when I needed to bring students here" he mused, completely nonplussed at their run in with the blood suckers, holding out his arm. 

She hoped they would find a cure before the cure killed her.


	9. Loyalty

The walk back to the castle was as silent as the trees. She jumped in front of that bat to save him. She didn't know what was about to attack him. She didn't know she could have been changed for eternity. For him. But, it was just her duty. Ingrained in her. It wasn't something special. 

They stood in the common area between their rooms, undecided if they should try and sleep for a few hours or start the day as the feeble streaks of pink lit up the sky. 

"Are you aware of what you did?" he asked crossly, determined to hide his insecurity 

"I found a huge lead in your research and saved your life?" she swung back, anticipating his mood 

This wouldn't work. It couldn't be feasible. To continue on in such a vile manner. Duty or not, he was alive because of her. He refused to feel indebted to someone else. But he could stop being an insufferable git. 

"Thank you" he told her quietly, deep breath exhaling in resignation.

Furrowed brow unconvinced, she nodded awkwardly 

"You're welcome...Should we call for breakfast and slug through this day?" 

He reached out timidly, clasping her shoulder as he walked past. That was a step. He couldn't make promises on his behavior. But he could try. Try to be a functioning human. Not a war torn relic. Glancing into her face, he saw several streaks of dirt and blood. 

Leaning down, he performed a wand less cleansing charm, inspecting the small cut on her forehead. Dried blood. Probably from briars when they rode through the woods to get the tubers.

"You're a mess" he attempted to joke, the mood settling in the room 

"You're one to talk" she arched her eyebrow, an easy smile spreading across her face 

He never let anyone speak to him that way. To call him out. But something about this interaction felt...safe. A fight in which he knew the moves. Tried and true, sarcasm veiled insecurity better than anything else.

"You should fix yourself up. The students haven't seen anything as terrifying as your sleep deprived face" he smirked at her, enjoying her over exaggerated eye roll. 

———

"Severus, what are you doing?" Minerva chirped nervously as he brought in a steaming cauldron of freshly brewed potion made from the tubers. 

"We have to try this potion. And I need to know which of the students are willing to be first" he responded curtly, Poppy skipping over from the supply closet 

" Are you certain? We could face a censure from the ministry!" Poppy clucked, wringing her hands 

"They're on the brink of death. Of course it's experimental. How did you think this was going to go? M Would you rather me brew an embalming potion?" he bit back, eyebrow hiked 

"Severus! Why would you say that!" Minerva chided him, sniffing at the cauldron of neon blue liquid 

"Because this is a dire situation. The rules cannot apply. We find ourselves at war Minerva. Neither of us want to make these choices, but here we are again" he stated calmly, when all he wanted to do was scream at the unjust nature of life 

He didn't want anyone to die. And it was up to him again. The weight unbearable. He shifted his body heavily. 

"The effect will not be fatal even if it's not successful" Eve spoke up from behind him, carrying her supplies in her arms 

Without waiting for an explanation, he walked over to the eldest group of students, seventh years, miserable and sallow. 

"I need to know which one of you would be willing to test out this new potion. There has been no trial on it, nothing except my own trust and expertise. I understand your nervousness but it could be our last chance" he spoke plainly, hoping they would understand the implications 

After a few seconds, a small elf like student, blonde hair and green eyes raised her hand weakly. Severus steeled himself, carefully ladling a serving into a beaker. He handed the beaker to Eve, who had the better bedside manner. Handling potions as a matter of life and death still gave him panic.

"What's your name sweetheart?" Eve asked, tone dozens of degrees softer than she ever spoke with him 

"Marianne" came the raspy reply, the effort a strain 

"Very good. Thank you for your bravery. Slow and steady" Eve smiled warmly, holding up the girl's head gently 

Marianne sipped as the other students watched on, Poppy and Minerva clutching each other's forearms in anticipation. Severus held his breath, knowing that his level of skill could hold no match to an unknown disease. This had to be a step in the right direction. 

Eve helped Marianne lay down, checking her heart rate and lungs, ear to chest. Her stethoscope long since gone into the forest, the magic slowly overcoming it until one morning she found her instruments flying around the room in a vicious frolic, culminating as they shattered through the glass window. Eve could find a way around the magic, he realized with a shock that he trusted her. Trusted her abilities. He hoped it didn't burn him. Low expectations kept him from disappointment...but it also kept him from seeing things through. 

"It's not making it worse" Eve announced a few tense minutes later 

"That's an improvement. The last draught made them vomit for hours. Perhaps the properties of the tubers are binding well with the virus. Would another dose help, do you think?" he posed the question to Eve, offering a small olive branch 

Not bothering to hide her surprise, she thought over the question before answering

"Yes. I think so" 

Another beaker down. Ten aching minutes. Still no change. But that was good. The sickness was being held in stasis. This was a start. 

"Let's give them all the first two doses. Then wait until tonight to re-evaluate. Then I will have more brewed" he advised them all, beginning to pour quickly to the outreached hands around him 

———

After dinner, he and Eve walked silently side by side back to their common areas. The afternoon spent in brewing for him and diving through magical medical texts for her. 

"In some ways I feel like I'm back in time three hundred years being here...But light years ahead in others...It's really affecting my judgment" she admitted as they reached a stairwell leading to the dungeons. 

"Would you prefer to help me brew the next round? It may help you focus" he offered tentatively, never having allowed anyone else to brew with him before. 

She looked up at him with widened eyes, skeptical 

"You don't owe me anything because I helped you in the woods. That was just duty on my part. Not anything that you owe loyalty to" 

She understood. That his being was driven by loyalty. And she didn't expect it from him. Which somehow made it easier to offer when he knew he wouldn't have it held against him...

"I know I don't owe it to you. But you have proven that you are with me. Despite how we started, we are both in it now. So, would you like to learn how to brew or not?" he asked again, stern and hard 

She nodded, following alongside as they delved down low in the castle, the temperature cooling substantially. Upon opening the door to the lab, the scent of herbs and moss hugged him tightly. 

Comfort. 

In this space there was a process, a ritual, steps to ensure success. Everything unlike life. 

"Did you sit here as a student too?" she asked a few moments later, walking around the room, trailing her hands across the aged wooden desks

Yes. And he was ridiculed here as a student too. Hidden away in a corner, making himself small so as not to be seen. Until one day...he decided he would be seen and respected. What a massive regret. He should have stayed in the corner. 

"Yes. There, in the corner. Until I grew a bit older. Then I sat up front. Here" he pointed to the desk at the front, where he would almost certainly find his foot prints worn into the cement. 

"I can't imagine you as a child" she laughed, eyes taking in the darkness and the cobwebs 

He couldn't remember much about himself as a child either. Except wishing that he was in any other body besides his own. An ache tore through his chest, realizing that his life had been spent pining for any other situation and now that he was free to choose, he found himself choosing to fall back into the old. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything by it" Eve immediately backtracked, scurrying up beside him, arm against his, bare skin 

So much for hiding his emotions. He was getting out of practice. Routine lulls into a false sense of security. 

"I know. My life here was not always enjoyable. The only solace I received was in this dungeon, brewing..." he cut himself off, mentally tossing rocks into the holes breaking down in the dam of his mind 

"I know what it's like to not be accepted for who you are. Like you're not good enough" she whispered, eyes to the floor 

So close. In a world where everyone feared him, which was his original goal, he found it only to be isolating and lonely. Which he swore he didn't mind. Being alone better than in company with idiots. But Eve wasn't an idiot. 

Far from it. 

Had anyone ever held his hand? Her fingers hadn't moved, still against his, warm against his permanently cold hands. An involuntary flush creeped up into his cheeks as he stared down at her slim face deep in thought. 

Perhaps her family only thought she deserved honor in death as well. The thought rocked him. That perhaps she was only living to die. Living to serve. To surrender her life in search of glory and finally being good enough. Worthy of attention only after she couldn't bask in it. 

They weren't so different after all. 

"Small minds don't appreciate large souls...We can't dwell on that right now, let me explain to you how we chop the tubers and chicory root" he finally spoke, after selfishly allowing himself to enjoy her touch 

Shaking her shoulders and engaging in the present, she nodded, intent on watching and copying his movements. She would be an excellent companion. 

—————

"We can only keep them in this middle phase for so long Sev" Eve spoke to him two days later, after they spent hours exhausting their research at the library and having books flown in from Flourish and Botts 

She was right but he had no clue where to go from here. He couldn't leave them in this limbo between death and life. 

"What do you propose we do now?" he forced his tone to be neutral, fearing what would come next 

"We have to contact trace. We have to figure out where they all were and who they all saw. It might be a big coincidence or...It came from one specific spot" she explained, looking around at the infirmary filled with students 

"How often does this happen and it's a fluke?" he questioned, already knowing the answer 

"Rarely. We need to find out who was the original carrier, and where they were and who they saw. Then who came next. Find that first person, you'll be closer to finding the source of your outbreak. I hate to think that this was a malicious act but...It could be" she prepared him, the sunlight shimmering off of the bubble skin charm on her arms 

Since his arrival, he taught Minerva how to perform the charm and the sickness had slowed down amongst the students but some were still falling ill. They needed to figure out the point of origin, she was correct. The thought of someone purposely infecting students rattled him, but it wouldn't surprise him. He knew the depths that evil could reach. The quicker they stopped it, the better. 

"Tell me how to do that" he said brusquely, steeling himself for the next phase of their journey.


	10. Contact

He drew another line to the contact tree. Twelve hours straight. Interviewing each student, seeing where they had been and who they had been in contact with for the last month. The trace map resembled veins through the body. A tangled mess of people's lives and actions. 

But they believed that they found the first infected student based on length of symptoms. Ella Litwick, second year, old magic pureblood. He had vague memories of a Litwick in the round table meetings with the death eaters. The poor girl seemed to have no idea of any family dealings, believing the danger to be gone after the defeat of the dark lord.

"Do you think they would have done it on purpose?" Eve asked, chewing her thumbnail 

"Yes. No doubt in my mind there are still some loyalists out there. Those still faithful to the dark lord's purpose" he answered quickly, perhaps too quickly 

"What was his purpose? Power?" she asked curiously, spitting the shredded nail across the room 

"That is vile, ripping off your skin and leaving it to rot on our shared floor. His purpose was blood purity. A master race of pure magical beings. No half bloods. No mixed blood. They would take over and make muggles their slaves" he chided her before informing her of the murderous wishes of his old master 

She blew out a deep breath, rubbing the bridge of her nose

"So, magical genocide. Racism still exists even within this world? Maybe even more?" 

He nodded, giving her time to process the information.

"Well...Then we can't let the bastards win" she declared with a half cocked grin, stray hairs falling into her face, hair bun loose and off to the side. 

He resisted the urge to tuck her hair behind her ear, that wouldn't help anyone. Reign it in.

"Severus! We have visitors coming. Potter and Weasley and Kingsley. They want to be informed of the progress you've made and to tell you about the other cases that are spreading rather quickly throughout the city..." Minerva bustled into the room, speaking as if she didn't just destroy his whole day, then turning back out on tip toes 

Potter. They had reached an understanding. He hoped he never had to see him again. But now, of course he shows up. Potter knew nothing of his anguish, even though he saw the Pensieve. It's possible that he deserved it, left to toil in his dungeons while Potter went on to receive global acclaim as the poster child for goodness. He, Severus Snape may not be the vision of perfect morality, but he knew what was in his soul. He couldn't continually strive to be understood when no one cared to understand him. 

"If they must" he spoke in a bored drawl, slipping back into his old role like a well worn coat 

"You going to be okay?" Eve asked nervously, coming around the table awkwardly to stand beside him 

"Why wouldn't I be?" he threw at her roughly, instantly hating that he could so easily hurt her when he felt threatened 

"You just looked upset...You hide it well but I can see it" she whispered, tiny hand warm on his shoulder 

"I don't know what you thought you saw. But I'm fine" he held strong to his facade, desperately needing to find some time to himself to gather his thoughts before they poured out 

"I thought we were past this Sev" she muttered, stomping to the bedroom door 

"You don't understand Eve. Don't pretend that you for one second can understand what I went through for the last thirty years" he instantly regretted his outburst, the pain beginning to seep 

"You know why you get mad at me Sev? Because I don't pity you. So you had a rough life? So did I. You had to do things against your will, so did I. You have to live with your screaming demons? So the fuck do I. And I'm not a mean-hearted asshole. Quit trying to push away any person who wants to help you" she yelled at him from her door, before promptly slamming it for effect. 

He knew he was pushing her away. He didn't know any other way to be. Taking a deep breath, he realized he didn't know her life either. The things she had gone through couldn't really compare to his, but that shouldn't matter. 

Later. He would apologize after they talked to Potter. 

Ten minutes later, Eve walked out with her shoulders back and head up. But he saw. Saw the red in her eyes, the puff underneath, the clenched jaw. 

"Let's go. Pearl told me that they are in Minerva's office and waiting for us" she commanded, breezing past him, knowing he would follow.

Once in Dumbledore's old office, he steeled himself. His worst memories flooding his mind, planning the death of his friend over tea. Using this office as his own, under the worst circumstances. An imposter. Yet, here he was. Staring into the anxious faces of Potter and Weasley. His life's mission sitting in front of him. Penance. 

"Hello sir" Potter extended out his hand, and for the sake of everyone involved, he shook it in reciprocity 

Weasley nodded, hands firmly in his pockets. He had the privilege of holding onto his grudges. 

Kingsley shook his hand as well, at ease in the room, inviting them all to sit. Eve said nothing, reading the environment and getting her bearings.

"The cases are spreading sir, and the symptoms are getting worse...A small village of liberated house elves passed away after only having the sickness for three days" Potter spoke to him, reflexively calling him sir when he didn't want any such moniker. 

He used to crave respect. Not anymore. 

"Is it possible they declined so quickly because they were elves?" he asked the young man, working hard to keep his voice neutral 

"It's possible. They don't have the same immune system as we do. Or, they got a stronger dose of the virus" Potter explained, palms out in uncertainty 

"It's possible that we are looking at a biological sickness as well as a dark magical component. Each student is reacting differently to the same potion. It tells me that something varies within each case but we're still working on figuring out what" Severus explained to the three men sitting in front of him 

"It's possible that the person responsible for this magically changes the virus before they infect each individual person. We've traced suspects down to three people, all magical blood" Eve sat forward, elbows on her knees, voice creaking 

"They use a different unique curse each time? That's very complicated magic. Are we absolutely certain this is on purpose, and not a result of simply nature?" Kingsley asked in his slow monotone 

"There is almost certainly a magical cure involved in this sickness. There is little chance it's a natural phenomena. Each strain needs to be treated differently. But we can't do that until we find out what the curse is...Or find who has been infecting people" Severus explained, the enormity of the task daunting, even to him 

"How are you going to go about treating the strains?" Potter asked, not an ounce of arrogance 

"There are several magical varieties of tubers that grow around the world that aid in reversing the effects of dark magic. But they won't stop the sickness completely until we figure out the counter curse that has been bound to the virus. Eve dutifully found that research in a medicinal index" he explained, willing to give her the credit for the breakthrough 

She offered a small smile, uncharacteristically sitting back in silence. 

"I thought Eve would be a great help to you Professor. She had already known you for so long when she offered to help us get you back. We came to her for help with this outbreak" Potter told him, looking between he and Eve confidently 

A sudden sense of unease slammed into his gut. 

"Eve informed you of my whereabouts prior to this outbreak?" he asked silkily, sitting back in his chair 

"Yes sir. The ministry knew where you were but assumed you wouldn't want bothered. Hank was asked to protect you in the off chance any old Death Eaters tried to take out an act of vengeance. He often helps out the ministry in critical asset protection" Potter slowly spoke, realizing from the change in energy that something has gone wrong, but unable to piece where it had turned 

Critical asset protection. He was not a person. Not a life. Not his own self. He was solely an asset. His life only had meaning as long as he was able to carry out a plan. A means to an end. Still. He would never be anything more. 

The cold harsh reality dumped over his head, but he couldn't let them see that. His chest burned with rage that Eve knew exactly who he was the whole year and chose to lie. Chose to pretend. Chose to inform on him to the very ministry that could not care less if he lived or died. Only that he could complete a mission for them. 

And he had almost fallen for it. Almost fallen for her hazel eyes that burned foggy in the late night hours of lantern light. Wild waves of toffee hair that begged to be twirled around his fingers...Soft lips that he knew would taste of scotch. 

"How very forward thinking of Eve to see to my protection. Kingsley, what would you have us do next?" he asked deathly quiet, barely able to keep the rage contained 

"The students seem to be stable for now. Until the curse can be cracked. We will work on the leads you have traced and be in contact with any viable information. Until then, I think it be prudent for the two of you to search for the tubers and begin a stockpile of potion" Kingsley reached out a hand, his request worded in such a way as to not be perceived as a demand. 

But it was. There was no choice. There was never any choice. 

The three men departed in a silent exit, perhaps even dignified. Potter was no child, and he, Severus Snape was no longer a keeper to anyone's soul. 

Without acknowledging Eve, he left the office, hard bottomed shoes clacking on the stone stairs. 

"I know you're mad at me" Eve prompted as they walked into their common room 

He swished on the fireplace. He wanted to scream. Make a scene. But his soul felt beyond that stage. Now he only held a sense of vague futility. 

"I have been used for what I could give for my whole life. Why should this have been any different?" he tossed at her, hoping the guilt would crush more than any foul mouthed curse 

Wincing, she told him forcefully 

"Hank explained who you were. We had to keep you safe. You deserved peace" 

"You know nothing about me. Only what I've done. Not what I live with" he turned to his room, finished with her excuses 

"What did Hank explain? That I am a murderer? That I lied, cheated, and stole for over twenty years? That I hurt people? That I allowed people to be hurt for 'the greater good'? That I looked my mentor in the eye and killed him? That because of my own self pity and loathing, a boy grew up abused and without parents?" he purged the information on her, not caring about her reasoning for wanting to protect him 

"I know what it's like. I wanted to help" she straightened her shoulders, chin up in defiance 

He walked over to her, bending over until the edge of his nose touched hers, coffee tinged breath warm against his lips 

"I am not a project for your own failed grab at redemption. I want no part of what you are trying to prove. We work to beat this sickness and then we are through. Do you understand?" he watched as her expression drifted from defiant to ashamed to hurt in a matter of seconds

Then as quickly as the emotions shifted they disappeared 

"I understand perfectly" 

He stood back up, knowing that he was one strong wind away from toppling and he needed to compose himself in private. Slamming the door behind him, he didn't look back.


	11. The Room at the End of the Hall

I'm taking some creative license with Severus' backstory that we don't really know :)   
*******************

"I am fucking this all the way up Hank" Eve groaned into the pay phone down the street from Severus' home outside of London, after the debacle of her stethoscope absorbing magic and trying to strangle her, she kept magical and muggle life very separate. 

Sev hadn't spoken to her for two days. Since Harry left. The only time he spoke was to offer opinions or directives about the students or their next steps. They had been at his home for several hours now, taking a day to rest before traveling to Ireland to pick the first set of tubers. She excused herself to escape the ironclad silence of a man steeping in betrayal. 

"You can't treat him like a normal operative Doc. He won't respond to that" Hank offered, glasses clanging in the background 

"How am I supposed to treat him then? Like a child? Like a delicate flower? He used to be my friend, and now he hates me" she complained, unfamiliar sadness burning her throat 

"He doesn't hate you. You're getting close. His life's purpose before this had been complete solitude. He's in that ugly stage of bruising before it heals and you can't keep beating him up for information" Hank mused, surprisingly sage 

She rolled her eyes. Softness was not a strength she carried well. She blew out a frustrated breath 

"Thanks Hank. I'll try and call soon"

The early morning sun wavered on her face behind fluffy clouds. The beauty of the sky in opposition to the dark alleys of the post industrial part of town gave her the existential shivers. Not that Severus' home was much different. It was a skeleton of a house, not lived in and only a home by name. 

What was the point of him being so rude to her? What kept him tethered to safe guarding Harry? It seemed as if the whole of the wizarding world was there for him, why was Severus the lynchpin? Harry hadn't told her a reason when they met. He simply said that Severus was a brave man and that their lives were joined in a way that wasn't his place to explain. 

A small elder woman with pin curl hair and a powder blue dressing robe meandered out of the apartment beside her to collect the paper. 

She called out inquisitively to her 

"Good morning to you dear. Are you thinking of buying the house a few doors down? It hasn't been lived in for years" 

Feigning politeness, Eve nodded

"Yes ma'am" 

The woman ambled down the three concrete stairs to where she stood, leaning in close after looking around quickly 

"Oh you're American! You don't know. There was a bit of a scandal. Would you like to hear?" 

Eve leaned in closer, giving into the woman's need for gossip. 

"There used to be a family that lived there. Awful man, always screaming and drunk. I felt bad for the poor woman when I would see her getting the weekly shopping; she never smiled or looked up from the ground. They had a little boy, scrawny thing. Out wandering the streets and the park. So very sad" 

Eve nodded, processing the information. If she played her cards right with this woman, she could understand Severus more. 

"Did the little boy grow up here? That sounds very tragic" 

The woman shook her head excitedly 

"He played with a little neighbor girl, bright red hair. She would wave to me when she came through. But after a while they both just...disappeared. Then one night, the police showed up. The man hauled off in a drunken stupor and killed that poor woman. Pretty sure he died in prison a few years later...I never saw their son again but there has never been another family to live there. Are you sure you want to get into a home with that kind of history?"

Holy shit. Murder. And Severus had to live through it. Losing both his parents. A life of abuse. And now he was back in that same home. For what purpose? 

She realized the neighbor was still waiting for a response 

"I will definitely think this through. Thank you for telling me...all of that. I will keep it in mind ma'am" 

"Oh! I'm Helen. Of course dear. Hold on! I think I have a newspaper clipping of it. There was never much action on this side of the street so when there was I certainly remembered it!" 

Helen bustled inside, reappearing several minutes later holding several yellowed newspaper clippings, pushing them into her hand. After thanking her again, Eve turned and made her way back to the corner home. 

"Sev?" she called out, the house eerily quiet and still smelling of decaying wood and dust 

She sat down on the sofa, reading through the clipped papers 

"Spinners End rocked by murder...Father and husband jailed over murder of wife...Drunken debacle at Spinners End leaves more questions than answers...Eileen Snape, 37, found dead at her home in Spinners End from strangulation...Tobias Snape charged with murder of wife and disappearance of teenaged son...Spinners End man dies in prison cell five years after the murder of his wife..." 

The thoughts swirled in her head. Sev was listed as missing? His father and mother both dead since he was a teenager. How did he survive on his own? It's no wonder he was such an ass. 

Her father never gave her any credit, often overlooking her success but he would never physically hurt her. He wouldn't ever lay a finger on her mother either, that thought never even a glimmer. Her own father berated her, but she chose to tell herself it was because he only wanted the most excellent outcome for her life. That had to be love. At least of some sort. 

Emboldened by the clippings, she made her way up the stairs, creaking and groaning after years of neglect. The house screamed dysfunction, energy heavy and dark. The school pictures on the wall hung crooked, a skinny boy with no light in his eyes and too big clothes peered at her. A small portion of her heart ached for baby Sev, gawky and awkward. 

She had been a loner. Often choosing solitude over social anxiety and panic attacks. Until she was fourteen and her father made her join track, threatening to take away her weekend passes to the local museums. Then he pushed her into junior airmen training, for the college preparation, and then finally a shove into the army or else she would face complete annexation from her family and money for school. 

The room in the corner called to her, door slightly ajar. The little bed in the corner spoke of a pre-teen, surrounded by old books and quills. Pulling open the dresser drawers, she found sweaters and khakis, socks and underwear, all secondhand and grayed. There were no pictures on the mirror, no sign of a life lived there. 

Moving onto the bookshelf, she enjoyed leafing through the notes in the margins of magical textbooks, underlining in the muggle classics and alterations in the science texts. 

A note fluttered out of the back of a book, creased and folded into an accordion. Gently, she picked it up, unfolding the butterfly wing thin paper, reading the neat yet scrawled writing

"Severus, I'm terribly nervous about going to school away from home. Tuney says that it will be awful and no one will like me. I hope that's not true...Lily

That's not true, she doesn't get it at all. She is jealous of you. You will have loads of friends. It will be great to learn magic - Severus 

Mom says you can't come over for dinner. She said that she doesn't trust your family because of all the fighting. She is scared you'll turn out mean and nasty like your father. I told her you weren't like that. But we can talk at school. 

I would never be like him. I hate him. See you at school." 

Eve flipped through some more notebooks and a few other letters fell out, these ones with pictures attached with increasingly legible handwriting 

"I told James not to make fun of you. But you egg him on. Just ignore him when he says those things. You don't make it easier for yourself. Talk to you soon...Lily

I don't egg him on. He wants to make fun of me because he only wants you to himself. He doesn't want you to be friends with me. He hates Slytherin. He made fun of my clothes and my books, I couldn't let him do that. He's a wealthy prat and you deserve better - Severus

You're being ridiculous. I would think you're being jealous. I can't be just your friend. I have tons of others and you could join us but you don't. Leave me alone for awhile...Lily

As you wish. I only wanted what was best for you. But that's your choice - Severus" 

Eve bit her lip, the pictures were attached to the last letter. She assumed that was the end of his friendship with Lily. Looking at the pictures, she sensed a vague familiarity when looking at Lily but couldn't quite place it. 

One last scrawling script

"Don't talk to me again Severus. I can't be around a dark wizard. James was right about you. I can't believe I was your friend. Enjoy your 'fame'...Lily" 

Eve looked at the pictures, a smiling Severus with Lily, the two grinning in their formal uniform. The two of them making a potion together. The last one, a teenage Severus now tall and lanky beside a beautiful redhead, staring at her as she gazed away from the frame. 

This girl must have been someone special, for him to look at her with such bold adoration. But she seemed to distance herself at the end, why? Sev's life before the war was a mystery to her, she only knew of his mission during the time when the dark lord had risen to power. 

"Are you enjoying yourself?" asked an icy voice from behind her 

——————

He hated being at that house. He knew he should sell it. Or burn it to the ground. But it was a safe space to recoup for the night. He walked to the corner shop, picking up groceries for the night. Mostly, he wanted to get away from Eve. He knew she hadn't meant any harm by asking Harry about him. But he struggled to find any other way to channel his emotions except through anger. 

He just wanted his life to be his own. 

He pushed the door open, sending the groceries to the kitchen. Stealthily he walked upstairs, unsurprised to find his childhood bedroom occupied by a snooping Eve. Reconnaissance mission, he supposed. He wasn't angry. In fact, he was ambivalent. 

Exhaustion hung on him like a wet blanket. 

"I'm sorry Sev. I shouldn't have been in here..." she apologized, shoulders slumped, the pictures of Lily spread around her legs 

"Honestly, I don't even care anymore Eve. I'm surprised you didn't already know about this. Since you spoke to Potter about me" he quipped, sitting beside her on the floor, his heart aching at the photo of Lily and him before Hogwarts began

"Who is she?" Eve asked softly, toffee brown eyes glowing in the morning light 

"Her name was Lily. She was my first friend. She was Potter's mother" he informed her slowly, the need to expel the weight like a rolling stone down a hill 

"He has her eyes" Eve smiled sympathetically 

"Yes. And I had to stare into them everyday for seven years. Spending the last twenty years of my life in the dungeons, living a life I never wanted because of a woman who never wanted me..." the words tumbled out, sad yet fury filled 

"Why didn't she like you?" Eve asked curiously, leaning her back up against the wall 

He sought worth from distasteful company. Respect from the worst of the world. He didn't blame Lily for separating from him, dropping his friendship like a hot potato. He just wanted acceptance. 

"I was hanging around the wrong crowd...Getting too important for my own good" he shrugged, not wanting to expose too much at once 

"She didn't want to be your friend? She didn't want to hang around with more than one person? What happened?" Eve asked gently, uncharacteristically for her usual sharp tongue 

"No. Perhaps it was my fault. But she chose Harry's father, James. They dated and she distanced herself from me. I understand why but James was never anything but hostile to me..." he processed through it, knowing it would sound biased

"You met her first? And then James bullied you, so you defended yourself and Lily chose him instead? Instead of telling James to stop being an ass to you, she told you to stop inviting in his tactics?" Eve pondered, retelling his life story simply. 

"I am not innocent in this Eve" he told her defensively, still feeling a protection for his first friend 

"No you're not. But that doesn't excuse someone else from not sticking up for you. She doesn't sound like that great of a friend. What does this have to do with Harry?" Eve sat up on her knees, voice rising in indignation 

Shame rose in his face. He never told anyone why he was in service to Dumbledore. It was the blackest part of his soul. 

"I heard a prophecy about a boy who would rise to kill the dark lord. I told him and he immediately thought of Lily's son who was about to be born. I asked Albus to save them...They trusted the wrong person to keep them safe and he betrayed them. Lily died protecting Harry. That supernatural power protected him just as much as I did...I lived my life in penance for what I did to Lily. And now, Harry is safe. I wanted to be finished with that life. 

Do you understand Eve? I can't do this anymore. I wanted to be anyone else but who I was" 

He was finished being other people's instrument. He deserved a life to himself. 

"You just wanted to be Sev, the bartender" she offered a small smile 

He nodded solemnly, hungover from vulnerability. 

She sat quietly, hands twisted in her lap. Wind tapped at the windows as she scooted across the divide, wrapping her arms awkwardly around him, resting her chin on his shoulder, lips against his neck 

"I'm really sorry I did this to you. As soon as we finish this mission, you can have your life back" 

He stifled a shudder but he didn't push her away.


	12. Mistake

"Why do we have to apparate? Can't you fly on a broom?" Eve whined as they got ready to go to Ireland the next morning

He fought to keep his annoyance in check. Broom flying was the bane of his existence. Plus, he didn't want to remember the last time he rode a broom. On that night when he cut off Weasley's ear by accident. He never wanted to hurt anyone. That night was a failure in so many ways. 

"I don't like flying. It isn't time sensitive, it takes hours. Apparition mere seconds. I can make you a potion for the sickness if you want" he explained, voice thin 

"I've always wanted to fly. It's been a dream of mine since I was little. I used to run around with cardboard wings attached to my arms. Broke my elbow jumping out of a tree pretending to be a bird when I was seven" she told him with a laugh 

He stood firm, expression unmoved. 

"Why don't you want to? Can't you fly?" she pressed, smirk on her face, switching tactics 

"The last time I flew, I nearly killed a student of mine and had to watch several colleagues get murdered and I couldn't stop it" he told her bluntly, holding out his arm 

"Well damn. Fine. Sorry" she rolled her eyes, grasping onto his elbow, tucking her body into him 

They landed in the bright green highlands seconds later, Eve doubled over with loud wretching

"I didn't mean to be an ass. I've just wondered what it was like to fly, I didn't know such bad things happened to you" Eve apologized a few minutes later 

"It's not a problem. Let's get walking, it's a long hike" he brushed her off, walking ahead and up the mountainous trail 

"But it is Sev. I really am sorry. I can't drive in the rain because of an accident I had when I was in college. I know it's not the same but..." she spoke from behind him, skipping to catch up 

"I know you didn't. That's why it is not a problem. We have at least a fifteen kilometer hike, given what the medicinal books say about where to find the highland tuberose" he brushed her off again, the hug from last night popping up in his brain 

Silently they trudged through the woods, watching as the trees became thicker and greener, the blue sky dimmer. Slowly, his shoulders relaxed, chest expanding fully with deep breaths. Out of his peripheral, Eve's hair fluttered down into her face, curling with perspiration. Her lashes were abnormally long, he mused, resting against her cheek every few seconds. Absolutely not, he chastised himself, fighting to stare forward.

He went to bed last night cold and hollow. Eve held him for several minutes, neither speaking. The memory of her breath on his neck elicited the tightening of his stomach muscles. He wanted her to stay with him, not to have sex. Not to take advantage of her. Just...company. Her body weight on his lap tethered him to the present unlike anything else he had experienced. No one had bothered to get that close to him before. No one dared. They were too afraid. But not Eve. 

He still went to bed alone. 

The sounds of the forest became quiet, the hush comforting him. Nothing but their feet against the dirt. 

"So what do you do when it rains?" he asked as they neared the ten kilometer mark 

She laughed before replying 

"I ride the bus" 

The forest rose up into a sharp mountain in front of them, the side over grown with roses and weeds. The sight took his breath away, hundreds of thousands of roses, varying from white to crimson red. Eve gasped, eyes wide in amazement.

"We need to dig deep down, at least three feet. It looks unassuming, but don't let it fool you...As we've seen" he told her, looking around at the countryside 

Eve dropped to her knees, digging with the shovel he transformed from a rock. He preferred to use his wand, easily tossing the dirt. He pulled up a wiggling cylinder, pink and fleshy. Grimacing, he charmed it still, dropping it into his ingredient bag. 

"This is disgusting. They're like dismembered penises" Eve gagged, pulling one up out of the ground, flopping out of her hand 

He fought back a smile as he accio'd the escaped tuber into the bag. 

"Seen a lot of those, have you?" he teased, she didn't grimace at his open hand wound but a flaccid tuber made her queasy 

"You have your war stories about hacked off ears and I have mine about dismembered genitalia, let's save those stories for another time" she teased back, pulling up another from the dirt with two fingers 

Noted. 

"Well. Sev. I think the ground is mad..." Eve announced a few minutes later, voice excessively calm 

Glancing over, he noticed weeds from the ground winding their way around her wrist and up her arm with alarming speed. 

"Vinea discerno" he pointed his wand at the offending weed, and it quickly shriveled 

"Thanks" she smiled, shaking off the detritus 

"Definitely not as valiant as beating away a vampire bat" he quipped, counting over a hundred tubers in the bag 

Before she could respond, an angry Irish voice made its way up the mountainside

"Come to steal my roses again?! I told ya what would happen if ya came back!" 

"Get up! We'll disapparate!" he hissed as the incoming sound of dogs and the clicking of safety on a gun circled them 

"Follow me" she whispered harried, before jumping onto him, pushing him back onto the ground, her cheek against his, hair flowing over him

"Put your arms around my waist, we have to make it look believable" she whispered in his ear, wrapping her legs around his 

He did as she said, slipping his hands under her shirt, placing his palms on the sweaty skin of her lower back, pressing her body into his hips, pushing up to meet her. Her lips made their way under his ear, a long and drawn out kiss on his neck with her tongue tickling the soft spot under his lobe, teeth gently biting the soft flesh near his shoulder. He couldn't help it as an involuntary groan escaped his mouth. His lips burned, dying to reciprocate but unable to get past the mental wall. Knowing that this was all a ruse. 

"Ay! What you doing?!" asked an exasperated voice, much less angry than three seconds before 

Eve rolled off of him, standing up with her hands folded behind her back, voice three octaves higher and as sweet as sugar 

"I'm sorry...My husband and I had a babysitter for the day and we got lost from the trail...I'm sorry if we were on your property. Do people steal your flowers?" 

The elder farmer laughed, handing her a purple rose from behind him 

"Yes those damn kids from the nearby village. I understand that. My wife and I had five children and I can't say we didn't 'get lost' from time to time as well. You two enjoy yourselves then. But if you see anyone else, especially some young kids going after those magenta roses, you let me know? I live right behind those trees" 

Eve giggled, thanking him, waving as he descended the mountain. Rolling her eyes once the farmer was out of sight, she reached out her hand to him, pulling him up. 

"You are a masterclass liar" he commended her, half impressed and half terrified 

"Are we done now?" she asked, brushing off the dirt from her knees, ignoring his compliment 

"Yes. And you have definitely earned yourself a flight" he said with a short smile

"You don't have to do that" she said softly, eyes beginning to glaze with guilt 

"I know I don't. When it's dark. Less chance of being seen" 

"Thank you Sev" she whispered, holding onto his arm so they could apparate back to their camp 

Her fingertips on his forearm were a sorry substitute for her lips on his neck...

———————

He couldn't sleep. It had been two days since he began brewing and testing out different anti dark magic spells on the potions. Several held promise, but as quickly as he sent off a batch that helped to improve some strains, other new strain would pop up. He began to hate the mail from Kingsley. He was more than certain this was the work of a dark wizard or witch. A brilliant one. 

He stepped outside of the tent, the cool night air helping his mind clear. Eve tossed and turned in her sleep, mumbling something about a man named Marshall. He tried not to listen. She spent the days sneaking back up into the rose farm digging up what she could before the weeds would begin their attack and in the local magical library looking up leads for where to find more tubers for different causes and cures. 

The only problem: those were highly guarded by magic and not easy to find like the rosebud ones on the hillside. The danger weighed on him and he couldn't help but think how easy it would be to escape. To hide. To pretend none of this ever happened. 

But he couldn't turn his back now. He had invested in the cause. 

"Couldn't sleep?" came a slightly croaky voice from behind him 

He shook his head, Eve's disheveled bedhead somewhat endearing. The crickets sung as loud as they could, the air scented so sweet with flora it almost insulted his nostrils and the moon beamed down on them as bright as midday. An idea popped into his head, he remembered what he promised her. Now was as good a time as any. 

"Would you like to go for a broom ride?" he asked nonchalantly, summoning his own broom from his backpack after transforming it from the pencil he carried it as to save space 

Her face lit up, the stress of research and deadlines and death melting away. He sat on the broom first, motioning for her to sit in front of him. He needed to make sure she didn't slip off. She slung her muscled thigh over and slid back against his chest, settling in. 

"Hold onto the broom. Don't let go" he warned, the warmth from her back seeping through his shirt 

"You won't let me fall" she murmured confidently, but gripped the handle nonetheless 

He kicked off from the ground, the weightlessness tumbling in his stomach. Memories from the battle with the death eaters stormed his mind as he fought to keep calm. Eve stared out into the trees beneath them, all swaying as if in a recital to music that no one else could hear. He flew in small circles, getting used to their weight, exactly how far to twist. Her hair smelled of tree sap, fresh air, and the ginger from the latest batch of potion. 

Cautiously, he placed his hands over hers, speaking in a low rumble into her ear 

"Would you like to try?" 

Of course she couldn't really fly. But he could. She knew that. But he could help her accomplish that dream. The dream of flying. She nodded wordlessly, fingers pliable under his, allowing themselves to be moved and bent at will, flying high and low through trees and valleys. He rested his chin on her shoulder, fighting the urge to trace her neck with his tongue. But there was no farmer to fool flying above the tree line. 

After flying through the darkest part of the night, he brought them back down to the ground. Oddly silent but radiating energy, Eve looked up at him, hazel eyes gleaming black in the four am darkness. Slowly, as if he would spook, she wrapped her arms around his neck, leaning up into his body, kissing his collarbone, his jaw, and finally his cheek. 

He should say no. He should stop this. But he didn't want to. 

Desire burst forth in his chest like a broken rib. Tingles spreading across his skin like wildfire. He was wanted. Needed. Not reviled. Easily picking her up, he held her hips as she wrapped her legs around him, biting his neck with a throaty moan. 

Gently, more gently than he thought he could muster, he laid Eve down on her bed, body atop hers like a weight. She slid her hands under his shirt, thumbs massaging the tight muscles in his lower back. Curiously, he ran his hand from her hip, over her ribs and breast, gripping the hair at the base of her head just tight enough. Her body reacted strongly, pushing into him, breathing rapid and shallow as she tried to capture his lips. 

He turned away. 

"Please don't stop" she complained, tucking his hair behind his ear 

But he couldn't do this. He wasn't the type of man to give pleasure with no purpose. It wouldn't be fair. To either of them. 

"You don't know who I am. This is all just because we are lonely and at a loss" he told her abruptly, defense building like a fortress wall 

"I can see who you want to be" she whispered fiercely, forehead stuck to his, straight bridge nose touching his as her breath warmed his lips 

"Who is Marshall?" he asked in what he hoped was a non-accusatory tone 

She bit her cheek, legs still wrapped around his before she admitted quietly 

"He was my fiancé. He died a month before our wedding...He got sick...Three years ago" 

And she still dreamt of him. Just like he dreamt of Lily. The two of them both trying to recapture the feeling of their dreams. Of lost love. Trying to replace it with haphazard lust. It would only lead to disappointment. 

He stood up, every ounce of will power in him tested

"We can't do this Eve. It's not fair to either of us. We're chasing dreams. This won't mean anything...We should forget about this..."

Silence. Then she nodded, straightening her top, the sharp and walled off gleam back to her eye as she rolled over in her bed, effectively ending the conversation 

"You're right. Let's just forget it happened" 

They were both terrifyingly good liars.


	13. Sabotage

"It's getting worse. The sickness is shifting..." Kingsley told him that morning as they met up outside of Bucharest. 

"I am well aware. I've been brewing as many different concoctions as I can manage. And until you have someone in custody, I cannot help you with a counter curse. To blindly begin trying to heal dark magic could have dire consequences" Severus forced his tone calm, internally panicking as the death toll began to rise amongst the pocketed villages of witches and wizards in the European countryside 

"I have several leads but I can't follow up on all of them. That's why I came, I was wondering if you and Eve would mind taking on a few scouting missions" Kingsley asked gently, expression neutral, fully prepared to accept a no 

He didn't want to go on a mission. Finding these tubers was enough. He couldn't risk spending more time with Eve, not with what happened the week before...But perhaps this could move along the process if he helped suss out the suspects. Perhaps they could be done and living their own lives within the month. 

Exhaling deeply, he took the paper from Kingsley's hand and placed it in his pocket. 

"Thank you Severus. Give my regards to Eve" Kingsley nodded at him in appreciation and disapparated from sight. 

He rubbed his forehead, turning back inside. Eve sat up against the wall asleep. Both of them took turns having nightmares. He eventually gave into the insomnia, brewing potion after potion, hoping to find the one that affected the virus. 

She began twitching in her sleep, as he noticed she would do. Soon she would start crying. And then wake up. He would ignore it. Just like he always did. He couldn't let her know that he wanted to help. 

"I did it again, huh?" she whispered, sighing resignedly, eyes still closed 

"Fourth time this week" he replied, not looking up from his cauldron. 

"What did Kingsley say to you?" she stood, stretching as tall as she could, elbows and knees popping audibly 

"He asked if we could scout out a few suspects. Move the process along. He's getting worried because of all the deaths" he informed her, waiting for the backlash 

"That's a good idea. We need to move faster. I can get information" she smiled facetiously, pouring tea from the kettle

"We can't torture people" he quipped, pressing on the small of his back, aching as usual 

"Isn't that your area of expertise?" she shot back drily, the honesty of it unable to make him angry but lack of judgment on her part made him almost chuckle 

"I suppose so. I'm going to bottle this up and then we need to be off. Hold still, let me clean up your hair or else you'll scare our suspects away" he flipped his wand at her quickly, the dirt and tangles from wilderness camping disappearing instantly 

Rolling her eyes, she began to pack up her things. He sent them all to her backpack and into his bag instead. 

"You know, I want to be mad at you for that. But I can't" she shrugged her shoulders, leaning back up against the wall for a few more minutes rest.

—————

"I think it's weird that you can change your whole appearance with magic" Eve divulged to him that afternoon from their perch on a park bench 

"People change their personalities all the time. They hide who they are. This is just more visible" he replied, shifting in his spot. 

"Quit being right. Who are we looking for?" she asked him, cracking her knuckles 

"Aston Treemont. Death Eater. He has been in hiding since the downfall. But the word is that he has been making moves. Potter and Weasley got a credible tip that he lives around Bucharest. Short brown hair, brown eyes, mid weight, slinky walk" he answered, eyes scanning the alleyway 

"Did you know him?" she asked quietly, looking at the ground 

Yes. And his wife. Their baby. How they sat at the table with Voldemort. Pledging to bring the child up in the dark arts. Completely dedicated to the cause. Rich as sin. Family wealth going back generations. The ability to go into hiding and continue to work for evil. A good suspect. But not the primary one. He wasn't smart enough. But he could probably lead them to the answer. 

"Yes. No more talking" he opened his book, pretending to read

After a half hour, he was ready to change positions, but out of the shadows of the labyrinth of streets, suddenly appeared Aston. Alongside of him walked a tall man, regal and proud. Eve crossed her leg, pointing her toe towards him and flexing it. 

She saw him too. 

He zeroed in on Aston's thoughts, easily slipping in. Common chitchat. The other man left, but Aston continued over to them. 

"Hello beautiful, what's your name?" he turned on the charm, offering a wicked grin to Eve

Severus fought to suck in a deep breath. Eve would murder him. 

"Hi there! I'm Sarah. What's your name?" Eve immediately flirted back, flashing a big grin 

He fought to keep his reaction in check. Eve was full of surprises. 

"Aston. I walk this park everyday and I've never seen you before Sarah. " Aston smiled, angling his body away from Severus and towards her 

"I'm new to the area, how about you?" she asked him, voice several octaves higher and cool demeanor exchanged with something flippant and silly 

"I've been around. I think you're beautiful" Aston oozed, remarkably self assured and vain 

He remembered when she almost snapped a man's neck for flirting with her when she didn't want his attention. He knew it was all a ruse but the jealousy that sparked in his gut was real. 

"Thank you" she giggled, sitting back against the bench, crossing her bare legs exaggeratedly in front of her 

"Would you like to take a walk with me?" he asked with an outstretched arm 

Who in their right mind would accept an invitation from a complete stranger? Who would be cocky enough to believe that anyone would want to accept? Severus broke into Aston's mind easily, no walls. 

"Caroline doesn't have to know. Just a walk around the park. She seems like she wants me too. Just a walk..." 

Dumb. But not dangerous. He began to doubt Kingsley's sources. 

"No walk. Dinner. Tonight. You pick the place" Eve leaned forward, eyebrow raised, tempting him 

A fleeting look of fear crossed his face but he squared up and grinned. Writing down an address and time on some spare paper, he walked away with a strut to his step. 

Once he was clearly out of view, Severus turned to her 

"Who are you and what have you done with Eve?" 

"Oh but I'm not Eve. I'm Sarah. And I have a date tonight with a possible serial killer" she smiled, crossing her arms across her chest 

They needed to prepare. He needed to make sure she knew what dark wizards were capable of; he had been one of them. 

———

"What's your name?" Severus peppered her with questions, fixating his nervousness on preparation 

"Sarah Smith. Age thirty two. School teacher. On vacation by myself. You will be reading his thoughts. You'll be sitting across the room. Safe code is pulling my hair up. You are getting on my nerves now. I've done this before and so have you. Let's just get it over with" she rolled her eyes at him 

They couldn't afford to get cocky. They had one chance. And this seemed too easy. Almost as if it was a trap set for them. He stopped Eve, hand on her arm

"I think this is a trap. I think we should stay outside the restaurant. See what happens. Then follow him. Or see if he reports to anyone" 

For a split second she opened her mouth to argue, then mentally retraced the events of the day, eyes to the ground 

"You think he knew to look for me? Oh. Wait. What if the informant gave Harry or Kingsley bad information on purpose just to bring you out of hiding? What if someone is ahead of the magical police, and is leading them into an ambush? Because if you or I get into trouble, then they will come. What if this plot is bigger than the two of us?" 

"We're just the two bases at the bottom, trying to hold the rest up" he finished, relief flooding his shoulders and chest that they hadn't walked into a waiting execution 

They crept along side streets until the small restaurant came into view, and there sat Aston, looking side to side hopefully 

"He's dumb. Like. Woefully so. There's no way he's the guy. He's not even the guy before the guy. He's the grunt" Eve muttered, scanning the crowd for anyone else involved 

Her assessment wasn't wrong. He was the lackey. The fall guy. The expendable. The good thing about that was he would soon hear news about what to do next from the ones in charge. Then they could follow and get answers 

"If we get into trouble, how will you defend yourself" Severus asked a few minutes later as Aston stood to leave 

"I can handle myself. Just ask the vampire bat" she shot back, smirking annoyedly 

For several blocks they followed Aston, who for the most part remained blissfully unaware that he was being followed. Ignorance is a special kind of gift, thought Severus with a grimace. He couldn't imagine a life not noticing the minute details of every situation: body language, scent, speech style, unspoken hate, a whole conversation built on nonverbal cues. 

Aston stood in front of a small brick home at the end of a residential street, pressing his right shoulder into the corner of the stone entrance gate. A tall woman in a long blue dress glided out, a thick truffle brown plait swishing across her back. She passed him a small envelope, and he could vaguely make out her words, icy and sharp 

"Your reward will be greater when you bring them to her. Perhaps we need to send someone more fitted to the job..." 

Aston apologized profusely before accepting another package, this one obfuscated by a cover all charm. But Severus wasn't fooled by a bit of mediocre magic. Whoever this person was, they didn't have the best of helpers. 

The woman walked back into the house, and they began to follow Aston, Severus keeping to the back as Eve quickly ran ahead, still within sight. He forced the thoughts down that someone was trying to find him. Kill him. Deliver him to some unknown master. The thought terrified him more than his own near death experience with Nagini. Better to die by the hand of someone you know and expect than by someone you don't. 

He watched amusedly as Eve crouched down low behind a massive hydrangea bush, ready to subdue Aston and he would finish the job by taking his memories and then wiping it. Nice and tidy. Eve sprang forward, knocking the unsuspecting man to the ground, landing a swift kick to his dazed face. Severus swooped in, reciting the spell for memory retrieval before wiping clean Aston's memory. 

No one would know. 

"I can tell you've done that before. Swift. Decisive. Well done" Severus processed out loud to Eve, who instantly wrapped her around his elbow with no attitude for once. 

"High praise from you, what brought that about?" she pressed, digging her fingernails into his skin in preparation to apparate. 

"No. No more compliments. No digging for pearls when all the shells are out to sea" he teased back, slightly more at ease with the possibility of new information. 

Rolling her eyes one final time for good measure, they disappeared into the night.


	14. Tension

"Good morning beautiful" ... a sleepy voice spoke from above her head, pushing her hair away from her face 

"I'm not beautiful" Eve smiled, enjoying his compliment 

"Yes you are. The most beautiful woman in the world. And I love you" Marshall croaked, lips cracked and dehydrated from his IV 

"I love you too. Drink some water, your lips are cracking again" she advised, holding his straw cup up to his lips, then spreading balm over his painfully raw lips 

"Eve...Let's be real about what's happening...You know better than anyone else" Marshall held her hand, once strong and now fragile 

She drew in a breath. He was right. The tumor had metastasized. Infecting his blood. Nearly impossible to beat. One last ditch attempt. But the toll more medication would take on his body wasn't worth it anymore. She just didn't want to give up. 

"I don't want to lose you yet. These last five years have been the best of my life...It's not fair" the tears burned down her cheeks, face buried in his neck 

"We had five amazing years. You deserve to remember me that way. Not shriveling into a bed ridden raisin. Let me go with dignity Eve" Marshall rumbled in her ear, dropping gentle kisses along her jawline 

Of course. He deserved dignity. He fought his whole life for the justice of others. He didn't want to suffer. Didn't want her to suffer. He was being rational and loving. 

"It won't be long after you stop taking the medicine. Days...Probably not even a week" she whispered, softly kissing him so as not to hurt his lips 

"I know. You don't have to stay. It won't be pretty" he took a shaky breath, chest crackling like radio static 

"I'm not going anywhere. You're my soul mate" she kissed his forehead, realizing for the first time how deeply sunken his bright blue eyes had gotten 

Pulling the blanket up over them, she snuggled down beside him, inhaling his cologne for as long as she could 

—————

"You're zoning out. We need to focus while pouring these" Severus grumbled at her as they ladled a potion into jars 

"I'm sorry" she apologized without thinking, shaking herself out of the memory with Marshall 

He died the next day. In her arms. Quick and calm. Dignified. Just like he wanted. 

That was three years ago. He was the first man that she agreed to let through her walls. He was the first one that she allowed in. The first one that felt worthy. And for five years, her life had been nearly perfect. 

She and Marshall met during her residency in the emergency room after her service tour. He had gotten injured during a worker's rights protest; several bean bag rounds to the chest and abdomen. She wouldn't forget the swelling that told her his spleen had ruptured. 

After his surgery, he had ambled back down to the ER in a hospital gown and bed head, awkwardly giving her a napkin with his email. Considering his history as a protester, and civil disrupter, she saw no recourse but to date him. A peace and workers rights activist, he enjoyed seeking justice. 

"Are you thinking about him again?" Severus asked, not a hint of disdain or mockery 

"I'm always thinking about him. I miss him. He was my favorite person. He appreciated my neurotic tendencies. Laughed at them. Found them cute. And it didn't make me mad. It just made me realize that life was so much easier than I tended to make it..." she laughed, remembering how Marshall would wrap her in his arms, spinning her around the room, effectively calming her down 

Shaking her head, she didn't know why she divulged all that information. It wasn't like Severus cared. 

"He sounds like the perfect mate" Severus remarked, trying his hardest to show compassion 

"Why are you being so kind to me about this? It's not on brand for you" she teased, desperate to take the spotlight off her memories 

He sat down with a huff, pulling his shiny black hair into a ponytail. His brown eyes sometimes appeared black, but when the light would catch them, they appeared to be the color of deep espresso. 

"I don't know. I suppose I'm just tired" Severus shrugged, summoning a mug of tea 

"You never don't know why you do something. Why did you feel like you had to lie to me?" she pressed, flopping down beside him 

"I know what it's like to have someone you care about...love...die. It's like a bit of your soul dies too. Darkness just continually eats away at any bit of light you can find. And, your partner actually loved you back. The person I loved, hated me. Perhaps for good reason. But I suppose your feelings top even mine in this department..." he spoke softly, rueful in his admittance of one sided affection 

"You weren't wrong to love her" she assured him, wanting more information but knowing that he would clam up if he felt forced 

"Yes I was. She wasn't mine to love. I idealized her. Tried to control her feelings for me. I should have let her go. That's what she wanted" he sat back with a sigh, body deflating 

Not knowing what to say, she sat beside him in silence. Grief can't often be expressed. But it can be experienced. Many try to will it away with words and empty gestures. But she wouldn't do that to him. He deserved to have his experience honored. Leaning her head over, she rested against his shoulder and patted his knee. 

"This is inappropriate" he chastised her but made no attempt to move 

"Shut up and wallow with me please" she demanded, holding back a grin as he relaxed his long body against hers 

"You're incredibly bossy" he snarked, his eyes closed 

She laughed, catharsis. The pressure of the situation breaking. Tension releasing. How many times had she been called bossy? Bossy hung around her neck like a medal. Severus didn't say it with derision. He spoke it with a guarded tenderness. 

"You're one to talk. This is the first conversation we've had in days where you haven't been barking orders at me" she rested her hand against his, fully relaxed 

"I don't know how to speak in any other way" he mumbled

"Because you like to be in control" she smiled, understanding his motive 

"Yes I do..." he admitted, half asleep 

"Me too" she sighed as a deep calm came over her, nestling down further into his body

The first rays of watery morning light trickled through the windows, rousing her awake 

Severus lay sleeping, shirt askew, the skin of his thin stomach visible. Fighting the urge to touch him, she stay still, the two of them horizontal on the couch. 

The whole night. Over twelve hours. She slept straight through. He smelled like the forest, moss and rain. 

"Severus" she leaned up, whispering his name into the hazy morning 

Groaning, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. Fingertips grazing her lower back, up and down. Rough and gentle. The movement familiar and tentative; almost as if he had thought about it but never had the chance to try it. Turning his body toward her, not fully awake, he slid his calloused hands under her shirt, instinctively pushing his pelvis into her hips, breath ragged against her throat. 

It had been so long since she had been touched this way. Unguarded. Wanted. Desire so thick she could barely breathe. The scar on his neck called to her, marks of valor and bravery. But she didn't want to react for fear of breaking the spell. 

The magic of morning stuck between two worlds; the real and the fictional, the mundane and the magical, walls and open borders. 

But she wasn't brave enough. 

"Hey...it's me. Eve" she whispered again, louder, lips moving against his ear 

He didn't know what he was doing. It would be wrong to take advantage of this. 

"I know who it is, you're the only person I've been with for the last six months" he grumbled but still hadn't opened his eyes 

Six months. Time was a son of a bitch. They had leads. And they had information to follow up on from the envelope they stole from Aston. 

But Severus needed to hear something first. 

"You were right, you didn't deserve Lily...You deserve someone much better. Someone who appreciates you for who you are. Someone who will fight for you. Someone who will love you even though you can be an ass. You're a good man Severus. And you deserve a good woman" she leaned up onto her elbow, palm on his exposed stomach, lips touching the warm skin just below his ear 

He gripped her hip instinctively, shoulders tensed

"And who is that good woman? Who is going to be willing to look past all that I've done Eve? Who will want to live with the kind of man I am?" 

She held her breath. If she gave in now, they would both be in danger. Distracted. Vulnerable. 

"Time will tell I suppose" she slung her legs across him, fighting every nerve in her body that was begging her to kiss his sleep swollen lips. 

He stared at her, eyes glittering and unmoving as he helped her stand up 

"We're running out of time"


	15. The Mistress

"Drink this" Severus handed Eve a vial of poly juice potion for their mission that night in London 

"What is it?" she sniffed and promptly gagged 

"It's polyjuice potion. It will change your appearance for roughly an hour. Kingsley sent me the hairs of two suspects who are supposedly a part of the inner circle. Have you read the intel report?" he swallowed down the thick sludge, forcing back a gag 

"Memorized it" she assured him, holding her nose as she took it like a shot, clamping her mouth shut after 

Immediately they began to change: elongated noses, taller bodies, Eve's long brown rush of hair shortened to a brown buzz. He laughed as the buttons on her shirt popped and the seam in her jeans ripped. 

He tossed her some clothes he had picked out as she scowled in annoyance

"Take an exchange of clothes with you for when you change back" 

"This shouldn't be allowed you know. Highly unethical" she stepped behind the closet door in their tiny lodging room 

"But very useful. I'll use Legilimency to read the room. Stay close to me because you will be powerless in a room full of dark wizards. Hurry up, the clock is counting down" he told her brusquely, hiding that the nerves ate at him 

The other morning he knew very well what he was doing. He gave in to the push for intimacy. For the first time in his life, he awoke without fear. Without that jolt of panic. He woke with her warm weight against him, tethering him go the present moment. Because even though they were in search of a dark wizard or witch, in the midst of a mounting deathly crisis, he had never felt so calm. 

They had fallen into a wordless rhythm, used to the other, no longer walking on eggshells. He felt her heart speed up that morning, sensed the abrupt change in her thoughts even if he tried not to intrude. 

"I know" she answered in a voice several octaves deeper, the two of them crossing the street to the meeting house, showing their wands that Potter had gotten for them when they captured the two suspects. 

He had to admit that Potter was growing into a successful Auror. Lily's sense of justice stood out in his genetics and for that the world would be better. 

He strategically sat them towards the entrance way, three exits within reach, their backs to the wall, wand at the ready. About four others walked in, paying them no mind. He took notice of Aston at the front, looking considerably less haughty than when they saw him last.

A thin woman entered the room, head held high in a maroon dress, shimmery blonde hair plaited down her back. She looked around the room, eyes narrowed, demure voice eerily even 

"Aston was caught off guard a few nights ago. Although, from what I've gathered, he was easily tricked. Allowed a pretty Muggle woman to lose his focus. How is it that we went from being undetected for almost a year and then in the last six months, our system has been infiltrated?" 

Shame hung heavy in the room, none looking up from the table. Severus' stomach turned at the similar feeling of a Death Eater meeting. The woman's heeled boots clicked across the floor until she stood in front of Aston. 

"Tell me, how is it that a muggle caught you off guard? What was the plan that night and how did you fail?" 

Aston stared at the table, mumbling in embarrassment 

"Madame said that she would be a Muggle. I thought that she would be ugly. Or dumb. But she was neither. I followed the plan until that night. She didn't show up. Instead of waiting for orders, I went to Madame's house for instructions. Then I was assaulted. I think it was the muggle" 

A nervous wave rolled across the room. The woman crossed her arms in annoyance 

"You allowed her to beat you with no magic?" 

"Someone had magic! I woke up with no memory of that night. The hospital performed a spell on me and there was a trace of confundus. From a very powerful wizard. Or witch. I don't think she is working alone" Aston defended himself, chagrin obvious on his face 

"Mistress, I have heard that Severus Snape has been sighted. My daughter said that she saw him at Hogwarts a few months ago. He was treating the students there from the first round. The first round hadn't worked, it began attacking the Pureblood children as well. We have since refined it. The percentage of halfbloods becoming infected is more than sixty percent. And several troll enclaves have been decimated" a man spoke up with red curly hair and wire rimmed glasses, sport coat buttoned to the top. 

The mistress smiled, eyebrow hitched 

"Of course they would bring in that blood traitor. He is their answer to everything. I thought he had gone into hiding. Couldn't bear to show his face amongst civilized society. Well. If that is true, it is no wonder our latest waves of infection haven't been as effective. Severus Snape is a great wizard. Aston, did the Muggle have a partner?" 

Aston shrugged his shoulders 

"There was a man sitting beside her on the bench, but he paid her no mind" 

"Was he there with her from the very beginning you blithering moron?" she huffed at him 

"Yes" Aston tried to shrink lower in his seat to no avail 

"It is possible that the wizarding world has stooped to a new low. Inviting Muggles to help out the cause. Severus Snape will have ties to Harry Potter and the ministry. Keep alert with your noses down. No risky drops. We take this week to recoup and plan. Murdock, Wood?" 

He and Eve poked their heads up at their aliases. 

"You two will come with me now. The rest of you are dismissed" the Mistress stood waiting while everyone filed out of the room akin to kicked puppies 

"You two. Murdock, tell me that you didn't fail at your mission as well?" she asked agitatedly was they stood before her 

"No Mistress. We found the hiding spot of the Aurors. Potter and Weasley. They are holed up at a small inn on the west end of London called the Sheep Skin. We wanted to meet with you before discussing further plans" Eve spoke up, reciting information from the detailed sheet Kingsley had given them. 

"Good. I will speak with Madame. Wood, I have the infected clothing with me for you to distribute at the Muggle and magical charity shops" she summoned over a box, tied down with wire but still moving of its own accord. 

Enchanted and infected clothing. Brilliant. There would be direct contact but no need to be physically present to follow through with the spell. 

He easily slipped into her mind as she took a sip of water

"Hand off the clothes and head home. Gods Kalandra, what kind of cockeyed novice show have you gotten yourself into. These idiots give me a headache. Send an owl to Serafina about the transfer..." 

Severus took the box from her, waiting for her next instructions. He knew how to be an underling. 

"Good work. Next week same time, you're dismissed" Mistress Kalandra waved them off 

He and Eve made their way outside, eyes meeting in agreement that they would wait for her and try to continue out the plan for capture. Waving his right arm in a circle, he saw Potter and Weasley slink their way to the back of the building. Several other Aurors placed themselves around the front and sides. They would wait for the signal from he and Eve since they didn't know the appearance of the second in command 

"Can you speed up the process of the potion?" Eve asked curiously 

"Yes, why?" he responded, watching for Kalandra 

"I have an idea. Do you trust me?" Eve looked up at him with her not right face and a smirk

"Revilio ad nuovo" he performed a semicircle movement around her body and she transformed back to normal. He transfigured her men's clothing to something similar to her own, guarding her from their vantage point in the alley 

"I'm going to ask her for directions. It's simple. She doesn't know who I am yet. Then while I'm asking you do your magic bit" Eve explained, the premise sounding too easy 

"She won't fall for that" he pressed, unconvinced but having no time to argue, he shoved Eve toward the emerging Kalandra 

"Oh! Excuse me! Excuse me, can you help me?!" Eve ran towards her, big grin and exaggerated breaths 

He motioned for Potter and the others to move in while she remained distracted by Eve's theatrics 

"I am here on vacation and I got turned around looking for my friends. Do you know how I could get to the train?" Eve waved her arms in semicircles, the motion going along with her story 

Kalandra rolled her eyes but seemed to believe it 

"Yes Americans generally get lost because they think they know everything" 

Several disarming and confundus spells hit Kalandra from behind all at once and she fell to the cobblestones. Before any non magical eye could see, she was whisked away by the Aurors. 

"You are unbelievable" he complimented Eve as she grinned at his disbelief 

"Keep it small. Keep it simple. Sometimes elaborate plans only arouse suspicion. We caught an insurrection leader shopping for apples one time at a market in Kabul" 

"Are you two coming along? To the questioning?" Harry asked from around the corner, taking the box of tainted clothing from Severus 

"I don't think so. The less she sees of us the better. I would like to take some of these clothes for research" he told Harry, confirming with a nod from Eve 

"Of course. Would you like the memory so you know what happened?" Severus asked, pulling out a long silver strand from his temple 

Harry held out a test tube and corked it, offering his thanks as he disapparated

"No glory huh?" Eve asked incredulously as she raised her eyebrow

"There's never any glory in a war. Physical or biological. At least this time I'm not hurting anyone" he sighed, taking her elbow as he apparated them to their inn at Hogsmeade. 

He felt it would be safe there for a bit. Hiding in the open. It was one of the places not hit by the biological virus. He had kept it contained to the castle. Once it ran its initial course, and no one was allowed in or out; and now, he realized, no one bringing in diseased clothing, it died off. 

His brew of echinacea, elderberry, and mugwort protected their immune system. Then his updated second skin charm had protected their bodies from being physically attacked. 

Too bad that hadn't worked on the other waves of infection. But he was closer now to finding a cure.

They walked through the downstairs, taking a table by the window. He smiled at Eve, her long wavy hair framing her face. Cheeks glowing with the warmth from the crowd. Shoulders relaxed and at ease. He trusted her. She was the lynchpin in the plan. 

"What?" she realized he was staring at her, suddenly self conscious 

"You asked if I trusted you. I do. Completely" he allowed the words to rush out, a smile pressing up his mouth 

"Hey! Look who it is!" boomed a loud voice, the crowd quickly hushed

His shoulders tightened, he knew that voice. 

Patrick Callahan. Pureblood. Death Eater. Not charged with any crimes because he didn't have the nerve. 

"War hero. Bloody hell. If this is what we're calling a hero nowadays..." his thin frame swayed a bit with intoxication, forehead shiny 

"Traitor is more like it. Couldn't pick a side!" piped up someone else from the corner 

No one disputed it but several looked at the tables or quickly shuffled out the door. No one willing to stand up for him. Not that he would blame them. 

Except for one. 

"Shut up" Eve stood up, hands gripping the edge of the table 

A group of inebriated men had gathered around them, sneering in alcohol drenched stupor 

"And who might you be? How much is he paying you to defend him?" Callahan laughed, easily insinuating that no one would want him 

"I'm Eve. And I think you should leave" she stood in front of their table, head straight and jaw clenched

He knew that pose. She was ready to fight. He suddenly became so weary. He couldn't have a normal life. She would always be defending him. Constantly be derided for her choice. It didn't offend him that she took up his plight. But she shouldn't have to. 

"Eve, you don't..." he started but she shook her head vehemently at him before speaking to the crowd

"Which one of you had the balls to face down Voldemort?" 

They all winced as she continued boldly 

"See? You can't even hear his name without wanting to hide. You're disgusting. Vile. Bigoted. Small. Your world would be in shambles if it weren't for this man. Your blessed Harry Potter would be dead in a forest if it weren't for Severus. Shame on all of you" 

Callahan pulled out his wand and aimed it at her chest 

"You dare speak his name? You dare call us filthy? Your blessed half blood boyfriend should have died in shame and let the world revel in its natural glory. He's not wanted by us or by the others. Traitor and a murderer. Good for nothing" 

Severus stood, wand at the ready, the air tense. Eve took a step forward with a sudden grin. 

She easily snatched Callahan's wand and snapped it in two. A gasp ran through the crowd at her audacity. Severus himself stifled a gasp. To break a wand was the highest form of disrespect. 

"Now what you are going to do?" Eve asked him, holding the wand in her hands like a trophy 

Callahan lunged at her, to which Eve confidently impaled his eye with his own wand. Severus stomach tumbled as the crowd turned quickly on them. 

He sent a powerful disarming spell, easily knocking back the crowd already highly unsteady in their drunkenness. 

He grabbed her arm and apparated them from sight.


	16. No Reservations

The room came into view as he apparated them back from the bar. He stood still and stared at her for a moment. This beautiful, enraging, intelligent, humble, incredible woman. 

He wanted to be mad. But he couldn't. 

She jumped back and immediately began defending herself as if he had already launched an attack 

"Severus you can't be mad! He was a complete asshole! You don't deserve to be spoken to that way! Never! You deserve to be honored for what you did! Those spineless scum bags never did a thing for any cause! I swear to god if you get mad at me I'll shove your wand through your eye too!" 

He smiled, enjoying her stomping foot and curled fists. But she wasn't mad at him. She was mad for him. That was the difference. Angry at the injustice. Willing to sacrifice herself for him. Standing in between him and a hoard of drunk death eaters. No magic to keep her safe. But she did it. 

"I'm not mad" he assured her, stepping closer, palms up 

He wasn't angry at her defense of him. He was upset that she could have gotten hurt at his expense. He never wanted her to get hurt. 

"You're not?" she asked suspiciously, eyebrows furrowed tightly, her pacing halted 

"No. I'm not. I could be. I very well should be. What you did was horrifically irresponsible. Impulsive. Illogical. You jumped in front of a crowd of magical men with no protection. They could have killed you. What were you thinking?" he told her sternly, taking another calculated step towards her 

"It doesn't matter, it's over now" she rolled her eyes, closing ranks around herself 

Not this time. 

"It matters to me. What were you thinking?" he tilted her chin up to meet his eye-line, when she refused he dropped his voice lower 

"Please look at me Eve" 

So close. Her perfume met his nose, vanilla and musk. Strands of caramel and whiskey colored hair framing her shining face. Small cluster of blue veins at the corner of her temple. Long black lashes laying against her cheeks. 

She flicked her eyes up at him, taking a deep breath before quickly divulging 

"I was thinking that it was about damn time someone defended you. I would have ripped them limb from limb with my bare hands if that's what it took. But... It really wasn't about them...I didn't even think about whether or not to defend you. It was instinct" 

An instinct to jump to his defense. She had no thought to her own safety. But she would do that for anyone, right? She did that on the battlefield. Was this the act of a soldier, or something else...

"And you would know how to do that better than anyone, right, Doctor?" he tentatively reached up to touch her cheek, flushed against his cool thumb, giving her a chance to take an out 

"Yes, I would. I'll do anything for you. No questions asked" she pressed herself up against him, running her palms up his chest 

He drew in a breath, leaning down to her lips, savoring her breath against his

"No questions asked...That could be rather dangerous" 

"I'm not afraid" she whispered back, tilting her head to the side 

"You won't have to be afraid...I wouldn't hurt you" he slid his hands up her arms, cupping her face in the way he had only ever imagined doing 

"Kiss me... Please?" she asked hopefully with a lopsided grin, slipping her hand around the back of his neck 

He immediately gave in. The tension released from his body. This was the right moment. All those little incidents had accumulated to this. Her lips soft against his, molding to his mouth. His body erupted into pins and needles, desire burning from his gut up to his chest. 

He took a breath and leaned in again, with force. She dug her fingernails into the base of his hair, pulling him into her grasp. She groaned into his mouth, her body attaching to his. He held her up, the weight pleasant on his arms. How had he gone his whole life without this? He finally had someone who wanted him. And he wanted her, desperately. 

He tasted her lip with his tongue, immediately accepted. Sliding his tongue along hers, he reveled in the glory of her affection. The insistence of her touch. Her hands moved down his spine, thumbs massaging the small of his back as she broke contact with his mouth and began kissing his neck. He bit his lip to keep from yelling, the pleasure that surged up from his stomach nearly collapsing him.

"Don't hold yourself back" she whispered, shifting to her knees in front of him, palm against his steeled erection, painfully slowly unzipping his slacks, grinning mischievously as they fell to the floor 

"You have a wicked plan" he teased as she rolled his briefs down to his ankles, appreciatively taking in his length 

"I always have a plan...Do you want to see?" she teased back, gracefully tossing off her top, full cleavage pushed up in her black bra 

"Yes" he breathed out the word as she unsnapped her bra, taking his hands and placing them on her peaked nipples as she ran her tongue down his length 

Stars exploded in his brain, grateful for the wall behind him or else he may have fallen over. He groaned loudly, watching in fascination as she applied pressure to his tip, swirling her tongue, bringing him so close to the edge and then right back to longing for release. He never could have imagined anyone wanting to touch his body so intimately. 

"Eve...I want you so badly" he admitted, stopping her before he could finish, leading her to the bed where he ran his calloused hands over her soft body, swaying curves, and indented marks and scare over her belly and hips 

"You can have me any way you want" she murmured throatily, whimpering in delight as he sucked her neck, leaving conspicuous love bites, flicking her nipples with his tongue, learning her body with his fingertips 

He slowly made his way down her stomach, savoring the taste of sweat and perfume on his tongue, the heat from her skin rising to meet his face. Her thighs called to him, sloping and strong, slick from anticipation. Curiously, he slipped open her lower lips with his fingertips, tasting her with his taut tongue as she gripped the sheets, gasping and bucking her hips to meet him. 

"Severus...oh please don't stop" 

He began to move his tongue up and down, finding the small bundle of nerves that he knew would bring her the most pleasure. Slow and methodical, he paid attention to her gasps until her body stiffened and muscles pulsed around him. 

She immediately swung herself over him, biting the side of his neck. He cursed, the adrenaline making everything intensified. 

"You're finally mine" she told him desperately, helping him get positioned outside of her entrance

He easily slid into her, nearly losing it immediately at the swift sensation of pleasure that tore through his body. Holding her hips, they gained a rhythm, eyes never leaving the other until the pressure became too much and he released himself into her body. 

Eve collapsed onto him, arms wrapped around his chest tightly. He held her as close as he could, tracing her spine happily as they lay all there in sated silence. 

"Do you really want me to be yours?" he asked nervously, brushing her sweaty hair over her shoulder 

She kissed him, gentle and reassuring, the kind of kiss he knew in his soul he wanted but never thought he would receive. 

"Only if you want me to be yours too" she replied coyly, resting her forehead on top of his

"I do want that. More than anything else" he admitted freely, less nerves escaping than he thought 

Eve grinned, dragging him to the shower for another novice exploration. 

Later that night, he lay spent beside Eve, body sore and relaxed. He absentmindedly stroked her hair, realizing a wish had been fulfilled. He wasn't a monster incapable of affection. The overthinking spiral threatened to disrupt his calm. Eve sensed his change in posture, tilting her head up from his shoulder 

"What are you holding back" she whispered in his ear, tracing her tongue along the outer shell 

Yes. He held back. That had been his life. Suppressing emotions. Hiding any iota or feeling or shred of happiness. Afraid to show anything for fear of rejection. Never once being accepted for who he truly was, he learned to hide and deflect. To serve rather than interact. 

"It's not your fault..." he managed to squeeze out between his tightened throat as Eve continued to press the tip of her tongue into the sensitive side of his neck, the intimacy between them thick as fog 

"What are you afraid of?" she stopped her ministrations, arms around his shoulders as she looked into his eyes, her pupils dilated wide with desire 

"That you'll see that nothing with me is going to be easy. I'm repairing a broken life. I have no idea what comes next. I want quiet and predictable. You will spend the rest of your life fielding off derision and spite if you choose to be with me. I won't be enough to keep you interested..." the words tumbled out before he could check them or filter 

She had years worth of time to adventure and see the world. He had seen enough. He wanted small and uneventful. He wanted to be back at the bar, serving drinks and going home to brew in his kitchen. But how could they go back now? Especially after tonight with their knowledge of each other's desires. 

Eve's face fell, holding his face in her hands 

"How little do you think of yourself? That a life spent hidden away with you wouldn't be rewarding for me? I've learned more in this half a year with you then I have with anyone else. We are both enigmas, aren't we? Each fielding a maze of grief and confusion...But that doesn't mean we don't deserve to be happy. To experience love. You don't need to be a perfect man to have those things" 

"You don't deserve the stigma of being around me. How could you be with a murderer?" he whispered that question, the root of his insecurities. 

He may have appeared morally grey but justice ran deep and he hated what he had to do. He wanted to be good. 

Eve pulled him in closer, her raw and puffed lips reassuring him repeatedly 

"I could ask you the same question. How can you want to be with a murderer? The weight of souls spent lays heavy" 

In that moment he saw her in a different light. The confident woman shed aside, and the scrambling seeking woman within. She understood his plight. 

"I suppose I've been very self centered in thinking I'm the only one with darkness" he admitted, twisting a strand of her hair around his fingers, kissing her hand gently

"Listen to me. Your darkness doesn't scare me any more than my own darkness. Let's find the light together" she offered, eyes alight with hope and vulnerability 

"I may be more darkness than light" he apologized nervously, stroking her arms and kissing her collar bone

"I want you to be your self with no reservations. If you allow me to be the same" she reassured him, hand on his stomach, eyes closed against his shoulder 

She sounded so sincere. In that moment he truly believed her. No suspicions. Nothing but truth and hope. 

"No reservations" he repeated, kissing her temple, sleep tugging on his eyelids


	17. Interrogation

"Severus...More..." Eve whispered, her body burning as he took his time exploring the sensitive area under her breasts, teeth pressing into her ribs 

He smiled against her skin, making his way down her stomach, blowing a hot breath onto her thighs, kissing everywhere but where she wanted. Teasing her. Playing hard to get. Driving her crazy. Three days had passed since their first night together, and it would be the last time for a while they could be together. 

They were scheduled to meet with Kingsley, Potter, and Weasley later that day. 

"So demanding" he faux chastised as he began to taste her, the gentle insistence of his tongue nearly pulling her over the edge, painfully slow and arduous 

He learned quickly, determined to show her he could please her, he could be vulnerable, he could be those things that he hadn't been able to be before. She invited in his efforts, giving back in the same way. He spent several hours brewing the newest upgraded potions, but quickly came to her, spending as much time as possible in her company. 

She couldn't stop staring, her desires rekindled after years of dormancy. Watching him as he brewed. Mind wandering at what life would be like when they got home. She was brought back into the present by his tongue performing the final flick, knocking her over the edge. 

"Your turn..." she whispered, flipping over on top, wasting no time straddling him, staring into his eyes, burning with desire and unbridled lust. 

"Eve, you feel so good" he moaned gratefully, gently moving her hips up and down, hot mouth wrapped around her breast as he arched his back and froze in release 

Laying beside him, she breathed in his scent of cedar, mint, and musk; like laying on the forest floor at twilight. 

"Why are we meeting with Kingsley again?" she asked a few minutes later, making her way to the bathroom to get ready 

"Kalandra is spilling names and secrets. Kingsley wants us to come and listen. He was very impressed with the Muggle medicine you helped me imitate. He told me if the by-laws were written differently he would hire you on the spot for public health" Severus smiled, the one side of his mouth higher than the other, changing the landscape of his cheekbones and eyes 

She didn't understand why antibiotics wouldn't work in the magical world. It infuriated her. The divide between their worlds had never been so apparent. 

Severus spent three straight days running tests and charm casting the clothes he took from the chest at the meeting. A notebook full of scribbles. Potion after potion, the tedious and minuscule change of counter versus clockwise of one stir...Even her research loving brain has become fuzzy. 

It was nearly two in the morning, her eyes burning as she bent over a book, when he jumped up, swearing in relief. He deduced that a form of the Cruciatus curse as well as a living airborne virus had been intertwined with the fabric molecules. 

How that was possible, he still didn't know. 

But after researching through her pharmacology books, she and Severus made an even stronger antibiotic than penicillin, with a magical component that began to reverse base dark magic from inside the body. Once they found the head of the organization, Severus would be able to fine tune the medicine and counter curse as well as get the locations of the infected clothing. 

It was the breakthrough they needed. Seven months of traipsing and digging, research and toil. The light at the end of the tunnel was quickly approaching. Then it would be back to normal. Back to regular life. Whatever that meant. For Severus, his normal had been a lie. A world fashioned for him to flourish without his knowledge. Perhaps he wouldn't want to go back to that...

"You're thinking. Your eyebrows are nearly touching" he stood beside her, pulling his hair back into a pony tail, flicking his wand at the love marks on his neck and the ones on her collar bone 

She sighed. Always overthinking and possibly ruining things 

"We're almost done here. It was our own little world, just you and I. Nothing to do but research and talk. And now, we have to go back. But everything has changed. Life isn't what you thought. And I guess it just leaves a lot of things unanswered..." 

He nodded, taking longer than she would have liked to answer, stumbling a bit over his words 

"You're right. My home isn't really my home. Hank isn't who I thought. The ministry is aware of me. You're...well, we're..." 

They were...What? Lovers? A couple? A mistake? Decidedly grey in their intentions. 

"Will we be done once this is finished?" she asked with forced neutrality, fearing the worst 

"I wouldn't want that. But I do think we have a rather unpleasant conversation ahead of us" he assured her in the same breath as he delivered a blow 

"You're right. Let's focus on the meeting and wrapping this up. No reason to be distracted" she kissed his arm, washing her face in cold water to push back the panic.

————

"You two are a dream team. Severus, the potion and charm combination has already healed the latest surge of patients at St. Mungos. Eve, thank you for your research on the magical equivalent of muggle medication. We truly wouldn't be here without the two of you" Kingsley greeted the two of them with a big smile as they met in his office 

Eve nodded her appreciation the same as Severus. Stiff upper lip. She knew he took no pleasure in being lauded. He felt guilty he hadn't figured it out sooner. 

Harry and Ron knocked on the door, shaking hands with Eve as they passed by, sitting opposite them. The light was back in their eyes, young faces wearing extraordinary grief and stress. 

"Thank you sir for all your work. It really is incredible. I know you hate being back here but we couldn't have done it without you. Eve, you are brilliant; mad and impulsive but brilliant" Harry congratulated them, gratitude dripping from his words 

"Thank you Potter. But if I remember correctly, the head of the organization is still at large. And we're losing time, they could easily change the curse and biological component at any moment" Severus cut in, determined to wrap up the project 

"Oh. Right. Well. Kalandra wants to speak with you sir. She says she'll only tell you the rest. Maybe she's hoping you'll understand her intentions" Harry explained, face sympathetic

"She didn't speak very highly of me in that meeting. Why the sudden change of mind?" Severus asked suspiciously, crossing his arms 

"I don't know sir. You don't need to do this. We can use the Veritaserum" Harry reminded him gently, thoroughly apologetic 

Severus shook his head, motioning for Eve to follow. 

"She said just you" she reminded him, confused as to why he would want her to go with him 

"I don't go anywhere without you. We're still a team" he replied gruffly, holding out his arm for her to go past into the interrogation room 

Still a team. Not yet dissolved. What did he mean by that? Would they not be a team for much longer? Forcing her mind to be still, she focused on the task at hand. Interrogation tactics filtered up through her long term memory. Be friends. Act innocent. Partner up. Those tended to work better for her than brute force and coercion. She wasn't big enough for force to work in her favor...Unless she had weapons. 

Kalandra sat handcuffed in a chair, a magical force field around her. She appeared non-plussed. Bored. She had been found guilty and she knew it. People who fought and acted up were either nervous and innocent or were trying to cover up their tracks. Kalandra was neither of those. 

"Severus Snape. I get to meet you finally. Your work is legendary. A master class in sabotage" she sat forward in her chair, standard issue criminals clothes crinkling 

Severus sat down in the chair provided, face blank and expressionless as he brought up the meeting 

"That's a change of tune from what you said at the meeting. You seemed to think I was a coward then. Ministry alter boy" 

Kalandra looked between the two of them, the dots connecting 

"Ah. I see. You were the fake tourist. Clever. Poly juice then? Infiltrated the meeting. Classic. I was a bit foolish then. I got cocky" 

Eve checked her body language. Confident. Calm. She knew exactly what she was doing. Trying to find a crack. And working on Severus' insecurities was a definite strong shot. It was a good, if mediocre place to start. 

"They called you out of hiding then? You thought our little operation was a big enough deal to leave your cozy nest amongst the muggles?" Kalandra arched her eyebrow, glancing between them with a smirk 

He rolled his eyes exaggeratedly, his only tell tale sign that she bothered him in his bouncing knee. She tapped his knee with hers to get him to stop. 

"I ran away but I wasn't hiding. I am tired of war and strife. Do me a favor and just tell me what your purpose is in causing all this sickness?" 

"We were so close to the next stage of the plan. After Harry Potter was dead, we would set loose the biological curse. It was supposed to only affect Muggles and half bloods. But something was wrong. That has been remedied now. We are only doing our part. You threw a wrench in our plans then and you're doing the same now" Kalandra told him, saying everything and nothing 

"Sorry to disappoint" Severus quipped, sarcasm in full swing 

"Madame is angry that you figured out a way to break her magic. She's searching for you. To finish what the dark lord couldn't. I have nothing left to lose, I'll tell you anything you want to know but there's nothing deeper to our motives than magical purity" Kalandra told him before turning her attention to Eve

"You're in danger too. No magic, poor thing. Imagine what could happen if you find yourself without one of the greatest wizards by your side? Madame knows that you helped figure out the potion and she has people looking. I'm sure they'll find me too" 

Eve kept eye contact, refusing to be cowed by any sort of threat. Her life had been threatened so many times and by people with stronger vendettas than magical racism. She couldn't allow herself to be scared. Once the fear crept in, so did the dumb mistakes. They were so close to finishing, there could be no mistakes. 

"Are we done here?" Severus drawled, standing up with his hands on his lower back 

"Don't go looking for Madame. She will find you. I promise that" Kalandra offered as her last bit of knowledge as the Aurors came in to take her back to her cell 

Kingsley and Harry entered the room, fighting to control their expressions 

"We can hide you. No problem" Kingsley assured them quickly, already with a list of places in hand 

"Why would we do that? You heard her. The Madame will come out of the woodwork if we let her find us. You can't let an opportunity for bloodlust like that go unheeded" Eve chastised them, glancing to Severus for backup 

"Eve is right. We let the Madame find us and figure out the rest of the curse" he reiterated her thought process and although the two gentlemen looked queasy, they agreed 

As she and Severus apparated to the side street of the inn, he held her hand. It was a simple gesture. But one that she needed. They were being hunted and their future was muddled. But his slim fingertips grasping hers were completely real. 

"I don't want to talk about the future tonight" he divulged, the stairs creaking under their feet 

The hairs on the back of her neck stood up, the vague sound of breathing and a foot tapping tripped up her senses. She held a finger to her lips, pointing to the door, gesturing that there was someone inside. 

Drawing his wand, he took a deep breath, pushing her to the side. 

The Madame had found them.


	18. Serafina

Severus roughly pushed Eve to the side. Caught off guard, she stumbled backwards and he closed the door, locking it magically behind him. She didn't need to be caught in a cross fire between a him and a witch hellbent on destruction. And she knew better than to bang on the door and blow his cover even if the Madame knew he was there. 

Wand out, he plastered his back to the wall, creeping sideways until he could see a shadow in the room. He waited, trying to discern the energy of the presence. No toe tapping or pacing. Nearly silent except for calm and even breathing. 

"Come out from behind there please. I don't want you dead...At least not yet" came a bored voice, Scottish, soothing in a reminiscent way. 

Not lowering his wand, he turned the corner and took in the Madame: standing as tall as he, thin and muscled but feminine in a green silk dress, her ruby red hair wound in ringlets down her back standing out in contrast against her porcelain pale skin and ice blue eyes. She looked familiar but he couldn't place her. 

He entered her mind but found nothing except himself staring back. Occlumency. 

"A bit of a let down? Not being able to see my thoughts" she smiled, teeth perfectly white against her pink lips. 

"Your use of occlumency is impressive" he answered honestly, bowing to ego 

"I suppose. Not many people understand it. I take it not many would understand people like us" she complimented him back, sending a chair over for him to sit on 

He ignored it, asking 

"People like us?" 

"The real ones. The people making the moves. Always under the radar but making the waves. You were second in command to the dark lord. How did you do it?" she explained with a smile, her tone reverent but underneath he could detect vitriol 

"A lot of backstabbing and manipulation. I'm guessing the same way you got to where you are" he shot back, careful to watch her wand 

"I'm a beautiful woman. I just smile and ask. You would be shocked to know some of the things that men have done for me on the promise of sex. Kind of silly, isn't it? Risking your life for a moment of pleasure?" she laughed, the sound awkward and out of place, almost as if she couldn't believe it 

"Nothing much shocks me. That was brilliant the way you wove the Cruciatus curse into the clothes. I never would have figured that out" he admitted, trying to make nice with a woman who he fully assumed was a sociopath 

"You're trying too hard to be my friend Severus Snape. My plan started to fall apart when they brought you in. I had everything set. No one knew where you were. Word amongst the rest of the death eaters was that you had gone into hiding. Why did you come back? You already saved the boy?" she questioned him curiously, biting at her lip in annoyance 

Loyalty. Guilt. Manipulation. A whole host of things that he didn't have the time to go into. Nor the mental fortitude. 

"I was forced to. Emotional manipulation. But I suppose I would like to believe I have a shred of decency somewhere in my body" he replied with a shrug, chest aching with disgust at his honesty

"You never really believed in the plan. You still have light in your eyes. You don't remember me, do you?" she stated coldly, arms crossing her chest 

He shook his head, wracking his brain for instances of her but could find none. 

"Come on in" she grinned, the shields of Occlumency lowered. 

His stomach rolled as he saw a meeting with the dark lord, the first time around. Dozens of them in their masks at Malfoy Manor. He saw himself sitting in the corner as the others mingled, drinking and indulging in magical mischief. He began to remember what happened next. In she walked, in a long dress that showed her cleavage and curves. Everyone sat to watch, as she began to dance and strip tease. 

He wanted to look away from the memory, but he couldn't. He knew where his mind had been, that her hair had been the same color as Lily, her skin the same creamy porcelain. But he refused to give in to her temptations unlike the others at the party. She walked over to him, whispering in his ear, her naked body pressed against his skin. He turned his face away in disgust. She moved on. The memory dissolved. 

"Serafina" he whispered, the name finally coming to mind 

"Hello. I think it's funny, no one thought anything of me. Just a Muggle born witch, dancing for the pure bloods. Atoning for my third rate status. But you turned me down. What makes you better than me? You're a half blood" she spoke softly, walking towards him, closing the gap

"I'm not better. I atoned for my own faults in different ways. You looked like the woman I was in love with. But she didn't care about me. I'm certain that's not the reason why you carried out a plan of biological warfare amongst the wizarding world, so why?" he pushed, growing annoyed at her dancing around the bush 

"Because they deserved it. Magic should be revered. Not become so common that we can't tell who is part of our world and who isn't. I'm the only witch in my entire line. My family deserted me. The magical world took me in but I was still seen as less than. I had to make them see I was worth it. I spent years in magical studies, working my way up into bio magical research, no one trusting or caring about my work on hereditary magic and how to keep our community from becoming weak and diluted" she proclaimed emotionally, voice catching as she recalled her life

Atonement for her blood status. Demanding respect and willing to sacrifice anyone to get it. Her thinking was rather convoluted but he understood the need to prove oneself. She needed to prove her worth. She desperately needed to fit in so badly that she was willing to forsake a part of herself to do it. 

That he understood. Perhaps they weren't so different. 

"I had forsaken every part of me to gain respect and I never got it. You deceived yourself" he criticized her, anger at himself projected onto her 

"Why don't you join me? I know you understand. It would be very easy. I see you don't have your Muggle with you. You know she's expendable" Serafina switched tactics, hoping to confuse him, perhaps throw him off guard 

"She couldn't be a part of this. This is magical business. I can't join you because I don't believe in your goal" he told her plainly, knowing that Eve was somewhere scheming and angry that he had locked her out 

"Rejected twice from the same person. Tell me why fight so hard for a world that doesn't care about you? You know they don't. As soon as this is over, they'll go back to ignoring you until they need something from you. We cannot be that desperate. We need to show them we have the upper hand" she explained to him, cheeks flushing petal pink with righteous indignation 

"You're right. They don't care about me. I'm not motivated by their validation anymore. How did you get the upper hand?" he asked, curious about how she got the clothes to hold a curse 

She grinned, crossing her legs from her spot at the edge of the table, her voice strangely disassociated 

"Did you know you can curse blood? Curious, you can't curse food or water. You can poison them but no curses. Blood, however, holds life. And living things can be cursed. I took blood from all of those who followed me; those who wanted to atone and prove that we deserved to be a part of this world. I cursed it with Cruciatus and infused it in a potion of blood and illness that I formulated. That's why every batch of virus and clothing was different; the blood reacted differently because each life is different. Now tell me, aren't I so very clever? Such a brilliant girl?" 

Clever indeed. Downright evil and mad. But clever. He realized if he hadn't been there providing counter cures, she very well could have succeeded. Cursing the actual blood in her veins, truly proving just how much she detested herself; enough to kill others to prove that she was worth living. Twisted. 

Before he could respond, Potter and Weasley apparated into the room, alongside several other Aurors he didn't know. 

Serafina immediately grabbed his arm, her wand to his temple, her pulse racing under his arm. She knew she would be defeated but didn't want to go down without a last stand. 

"Put your wand down, let's make this easy" Harry tried to assuage her, but she laughed, pressing the wand further into his temple, deflecting several disarming spells mentally as she threw back two of the less self assured Aurors with a silent Cruciatus 

They truly underestimated her vengeance, skill, and intelligence. 

Suddenly Serafina dropped unconscious to her knees, a bit of blood running down her temple, wand falling to the floor as magical handcuffs were placed on her to prevent her from disapparating or performing windless magic. Severus looked at the Aurors shocked faces, knowing that none of them had successfully disarmed her. 

Turning around he saw Eve standing there nonplussed with a baseball bat. He fought to contain his inappropriate laughter. 

"You know, magic is cool and you guys can do so many things I can't. But you make life a lot harder than it has to be" she shrugged, tossing the bat outside and closing the patio door that he hadn't even realized existed behind a floor length blackout curtain 

"Are we done yet?" she asked him, the Aurors disappearing with the unconscious body of Serafina 

"I really hope so" he answered, pulling her into a hug, not caring if anyone saw or minded. 

"You know you would be lost without me right, potions master?" she teased, her voice muffled against his chest 

"Utterly alone and devastated" he responded back, with not even a hint of sarcasm 

"Is that enough of a serious talk?" she wrapped her arms even tighter, relaxing against him 

"I think so. Yes" he kissed the top of her forehead, breathing in deeply the sense of security mixed with vanilla perfume. 

More than enough.


	19. Home

Six Months Later

He began to bottle the pepper up potion into vials. He breathed in the scent of the minty potion, the comforting and familiar scent wrapped around him like a blanket. His owl Artemis sat on the balcony, pecking at his feathers, hooting softly, impatient to begin his flight to Merlin's Hospital for Magical Maladies. 

When he returned from the mission, the hospital sent an inquiry asking him to please consider a job as their full time Potions Master. It had been an easy decision. A step back into the magical world but anonymous enough that no one would care where or who he was. But he could continue to do what he loved and contribute to the world. 

The question had been whether he would stay or go. Return to his small section of town and resume life as normal. Or plow a new path. Starting over once again. 

"Patience Artemis. Nothing good ever comes from haste" he spoke gently to the beautiful grey and white messenger owl, offering up dried salmon as a treat

Packing the vials in a basket, shrinking them down to a fourth of their size, protective charm on them, he tied them to Artemis' leg. The task oriented bird proudly flew off into the morning sky. 

He cleaned up his brewing station, taking inventory of what he would need from the herbalist within the next few days. Stretching his back, he couldn't help but glance around enjoyment at his well earned private potions lab. 

After the Mistress Serafina had been captured, he got to work on several cures based on the information she gave to them with the aid of Veritaserum. Within two months the cases had nearly all disappeared. And once again he was in the spotlight. 

The ministry touted his partnership with Eve as a radical shift to become more inclusive with the non-magical world. The pushback was not nearly as bad as he had expected, with the papers labeling him a reformed Death Eater. His favorite article said something to the effect of "If Severus Snape can look past non-magical abilities then so can you." 

The limelight stung him just as much the second time around. Questions and cameras and poking and prodding. He was no hero, only a deeply justice rooted human; he had chosen correctly which side to serve this time. 

The ministry awarded him with a vault full of Galleons. One million Galleons in fact. Kingsley promised "you can disappear for as long as you like now." 

But his small apartment hadn't felt like home when he returned. It held the energy of a life lived in shame. In fear. A life made to be small. And that was not in fact, how he intended to live out the rest of his days. He had outgrown his space. 

He bought a plot of land outside of the city limits, constructing a home that he envisioned while camping in the wilderness. A home that would hold promise and abundance. A place to heal and harbor in safety. 

A place to finally live free. 

Walking into the main section of his home, the sturdy wood underneath his feet, he made his way to the kitchen. He put on the kettle, measuring out the specific blend of tea: orange peel, lemon zest, cinnamon, hibiscus, and earl grey tea leaves. 

He carried the mug down the hallway, to the bedroom where Eve lay sleeping underneath their heavy weighted comforter. Sitting the mug down with a slight thud, he brushed the hair away from her face. 

When she returned from the mission, the hospital welcomed her back easily. When he asked how that was possible, since she was gone for the better part of a year, she shrugged and said 

"If you say it's military business no one questions you" 

Rolling over, she groaned, reaching for him. That was his favorite part of waking her up from sleep, when she reached out to hold him. She loved him. Knew he was safe. He was what she wanted when acclimating to the consciousness of the world. 

Their relationship took an awkward turn when they first returned home, the life or death pressure gone. Not knowing where to live or what they should do. The rules in flux and murky. An abrupt return to the mundane and routine. It was this simple gesture, him bringing her wake up tea that grounded them to their new reality. 

The fears and anxieties of their past lives hadn't gone away. But the companionship and trust they built had made it easier to live through the bad days. The days when the memories lay heavy and intrusive. The days when she had only slept a few hours or he walked on pins and needles because something shook him. Being together made the bad days easier and the good days near bliss. 

"You don't want to be late" he said, kissing her forehead 

"I wouldn't mind being late once in a while" she flirted, scooting over in bed with a grin 

"I never could say no to you" he mused, kissing her neck 

"Because you know I'm right...I love you" she kissed him back, pulling him on top of her with a giggle 

"I love you too" he murmured in her ear, soul light and content.


End file.
